If a man is afraid of losing a woman. Love in a man's understanding

We spend most of our lives searching for our ideal woman, and when we find it, we begin to hesitate. We fail to take this necessary step before we can truly call her ours.

You may think that once you make a commitment, it will be easier to make the next one, but this is usually not the case.

Whether to call your girlfriend your girlfriend, tell her you love her, move in with her, or call her your wife are all inevitable decisions you'll have to make.

Indecision is your enemy. Of course, you need to think things through carefully before making such decisions, but you should never doubt without a valid reason; real men don't do this.

Real men make difficult decisions because they understand that these decisions must be made.

A real man has no doubts when he meets his woman. Because:

1. He realizes that he is very lucky

A real man is a fairly experienced man. He has enough unsuccessful relationships behind him and enough meetings with women who are not his to understand that he has met exactly the one he was looking for.

He won't hesitate because he knows he just won the lottery, and what man would wait to "cash in" his winnings?

Why should he wait to tell her how much she means to him? He doesn't see any point in this.

Luck does not last forever, he feels the need to "lock in" success before some other young man comes in his way.

About 7 billion people live on earth, and not everyone can find among them someone with whom you would like to share your life.

Just as lightning does not strike the same place twice, a man does not want to get involved in a game of chance and die again.

2. He is mature enough to face commitment.

I'm not talking about the fact that he is not afraid of commitment - no, most people are afraid of this, the point is that no matter what, he is ready to take this step. He is ready to find compromise solutions because he is sure that his woman is worthy of it.

Perhaps he is afraid of obligations, but he will not run away from them; he faces his fears - which is what a man should do. In addition, he may be more than willing to commit himself, as long as he doesn't have these scary thoughts.

Perhaps there is nothing he wants more than to settle down and love his woman with all his heart. He may be ready to devote himself and his life entirely to her. Regardless of whether he is afraid of commitment, if he is willing to devote himself to his woman, then he is a real man.

3. He wants her to understand how beautiful she is and how much she means to him.

Most men, for some reason, believe that women understand how much they mean to us. Unfortunately, everything is exactly the opposite.

If your woman is not a diviner, you need to use your words and your actions. You should be there, tell her about your love and show her how important she is to you.

A real man understands this, and moreover, understands how important it is for his partner to know that she is loved.

Your indecisiveness tells her that you are insecure. She says that even though you promise to always be there and love her, one day you may leave her.

You may think that your indecisiveness is invisible, but in fact it often causes incredible harm.

4. He's afraid of losing her

Right. A real man is afraid of losing the woman he loves and is not at all afraid to admit it. When you meet your the ideal woman, you should be afraid of losing her, because this could become your tragedy.

She becomes your life, and if you were to lose her, you would lose yourself - or rather, you would lose the person she helped you become. She is an integral part of yourself.

A real man is afraid for the woman he loves and accepts and admits it. He allows this fear to guide him and help him realize how important this woman is to him.

Real men are afraid - more afraid than others. This is not a sign of weakness, but rather a sign of self-awareness.

5. He is ready to throw the whole world at her feet because he believes that she deserves it.

He wants to be the first and only one who will show her new places, let her try new dishes, wines long exposure and will give you adventure. He wants to be the first to give her many new experiences, because he wants to become as much a part of her as she became of him.

He wants her to look back one day and remember all these amazing adventures and for a smile to appear on her face. He wants her to smile, to be happy, to be satisfied with herself, her life, her life experiences and the decisions she has made.

Deciding who you're going to spend the rest of your life with is undoubtedly the most important decision every person makes.

A real man refuses to be the reason a woman regrets spending her allotted days on this planet. On the contrary, he wants to be a cause of joy.

6. He doesn't have the slightest reason to doubt

Not a single good reason, at least. Of course, we can always come up with excuses or even incredible scenarios, and sometimes even real nonsense, just so as not to break anyone’s heart. Real men don't do this, but scumbags do.

A real man has no reason to doubt or wait long to express his feelings. She is his ideal woman. If he wants to be hers ideal man, he will make this decision - and this will be the first step.

More often than not, people choose to be blind, leave and break up. Most relationships are doomed to fail because they are between two people who are unable to work together.

But when you find the right person, there is no good reason to resist. We can come up with a bunch of excuses, but they're just excuses. A real man is honest with himself. When he knows he has found the one, he makes her the one.

Despite the fact that there are no perfect people, we will tell you which women men are afraid of losing. Over the past decades, the dynamics of relationships between men and women have changed greatly, but the natural essence remains. We still continue to look for our soulmate so that we can confidently walk through life with him or her.

Attractive woman

Every man wants to see an attractive girl next to him. But in the eyes of each beholder there is its own beauty. You don't have to be a model, stay out of beauty salons, or resort to plastic surgery to improve certain parts of your body. And if you do, be careful. Some. It is enough to constantly look after yourself and be able to emphasize your strengths.

Kind and caring woman

A kind woman is an ideal of all times. Since ancient times, it was this quality that was valued in a woman, as the keeper of the hearth, comfort, love for her family and the world around her. An evil woman has always been associated, perhaps with a good lover and career woman, but very rarely with a loving wife.

An important quality of a woman is caring. Men are accustomed to care from childhood, but then they received it from their mother.

It is also important that the girl has a maternal instinct and love for children. Because a man looks to the future and must be sure that he has found a woman who wants and can become a good mother of his child. An example of a caring woman is Angelina Jolie. ABOUT union

Energetic and cheerful woman

Women's lives can also be boring and monotonous. But men need to be interested in being with a woman. If she is energetic, active and ready to go on adventures when her loved one asks, he will feel happier.

Wise woman

Every man needs a wise woman to help him get through life. They say that behind every great man lies an even greater woman. And it's true. Without a woman, a man is no more than an ordinary egoist.

And this does not mean that a woman should be smarter than him - she should have feminine wisdom, which distinguishes her from the thinking of a man.

Loving woman

A man likes to see and feel that a woman loves him with all her soul. A woman has a special ability to devote herself completely to the one she loves. And men want it.

A woman who is capable of giving in

All people are stubborn according to their character traits. But all relationships are built on compromises. If a man managed to find a woman who does not throw constant tantrums in protest, but is inclined to compromise, he will be with her.

A woman who creates a feeling of home

A woman who knows how to create comfort at home is the dream of every man. She must organize and think through everything so that the man always wants to go home with great desire. You don’t have to be Nika Belotserkovskaya or Martha Stewart, but you need to learn how to cook delicious cutlets. By the way, read our material about how these two

Strong but feminine

Everyone has their own taste in women, but men adore those who combine inner strength and femininity. If a woman is strong, she will become a partner and friend for her man, and a feminine woman is a man’s other half.

If these two qualities are successfully combined in a woman, she can turn many heads - after all, she knows her worth, but at the same time is proud that she was born a woman. Good advice on this score gives.

I'm afraid of losing my girlfriend

Difficulties in relationships

Get the girl back

I'm afraid of losing my girlfriend

Even in moments of happiness and sincere love, some guys begin to doubt the purity of their girlfriend’s feelings and begin to be afraid of losing her. And sooner or later it begins to take on an extremely depressing appearance, which has a serious effect on moral peace and the physical ability to make love.

It’s difficult to think about something positive and good when every day you are haunted by the thought that tomorrow the girl may leave for someone else, and you will be left completely alone. This provokes illogical and sometimes completely thoughtless actions, jealousy and threats of violence, in extreme cases.

Naturally, no sane girl would want to tolerate such behavior from her boyfriend and may indeed begin to doubt the advisability of a relationship with such an insecure man. This will provoke new wave doubts and worries, and everything will again take on a deplorable character. To avoid this scenario, there are a few tips to consider.

Why relationships deteriorate

It’s hard to believe, but almost every relationship eventually begins to fall apart at the seams, deteriorate and become a little more boring than it was at the time they met and formed. But brightness and novelty do not pass without a trace. In their place comes understanding, trust and love. And that's completely normal.

But many guys, who are used to seeing and not feeling, begin to sound the alarm due to the fact that the girl is no longer so willing to agree to go for a walk at night, looking at her, she is not so varied in bed, and in general she has begun to discuss with you to a greater extent their problems rather than the admiration of a relationship with you. In other words, men begin to worry that they no longer see the fire in their girls, and they do not want to accept the fact that the fire from the eyes turns into the warmth of the heart.

In this case, you just need to analyze the situation and honestly answer a simple question: “Does the girl see her future with you?” If the answer is “Yes,” then you shouldn’t worry and sound the alarm where there is none. If the answer is “No,” then you need to take active action.

What to do to avoid losing a girl

As a rule, in relationships, girls pursue fairly simple and understandable goals: be it a future family, recreation with entertainment, spiritual understanding, or material support with gifts. And it’s safe to say that one of this goals will always be much more important than all the others. And, therefore, you need to understand: “What does the girl want from a relationship with you?”

If you clearly understand that you satisfy most of her requests and desires, then she can leave you only in extreme cases: betrayal, betrayal, physical violence or ordinary stupidity.

If you are having problems making your girlfriend's demands come true. So you either need to work on it, or find a girl who suits you better. Because sooner or later such a girl will still choose another man.

It is important to know and remember:

Men treat the manifestation of love quite simply - I love, I give flowers, I do something nice. Those. a desire that turns into a result. Women value more not the result, but the process itself. This means that small gifts every day will be more effective than a large gift once a year. The same goes for the expression of feelings, emotions and sexuality. Women always need this, albeit in a small portion. Know how to use it!

Dealing with uncertainty

Uncertainty most often arises from the fear that you may end up in a worse situation than you currently have. But the more hesitant you act, the worse your situation with the girl becomes. Since only the man who thinks that he is afraid of losing only girl who agreed to be with him. Confident people know that if not one, then the other, and women see this and hold on! This means you need:

Money and prospects. When choosing between an attentive and a rich man, most girls will choose the rich man, since with him there will be fewer financial problems and more opportunities to express themselves a real woman. This means you need to take some time to work on your financial situation and perspective. Women don't leave successful men!

Physical health. To be confident in yourself you need to be satisfied with your appearance. For men, this most often consists of physical health and the volume of excess folds on the abdomen. Fortunately, there are now places where this can be resolved fairly quickly.

Impudence. A man must be a little arrogant so that a woman sees him not just as a consumer, but also as a real conqueror. Therefore, you need to learn to put your interests a little higher than the interests of your girlfriend. And the main thing is to skillfully show this to her, so that she knows that everything will happen, but your problems will be solved first.

What do we end up with?

The fear of losing a girl is largely explained by a man’s insecurity and lack of understanding of the girl’s goals. If you can take care of yourself and understand the girl’s desires, then all fears will pass, and you will become a real ideal for your chosen one.

Do you think super beautiful, unbridled sexy or incredibly homely? Is this true? Let's ask a specialist!

Men make no secret of their intimate relationships, but their sexual capabilities should only be rated “excellent.”

A joke thrown in the bedroom about manhood, a hint about a weak temperament or lack of mastery in the art of love hurts so deeply and for a long time that the fear of surviving moments of fiasco haunts them all their lives.

Why are men afraid of women with whom they have nothing? Because in relationships, at work, in the family, failure manifests itself even more acutely. To feel strong and confident, never make mistakes, keep your word, be an indispensable specialist and make great money - men carry a considerable burden of responsibility on their shoulders.

But don’t expect a detailed plan, scheduled by day of the week, because every case individual, every relationship is unique and exceptional in its own way. There are only basic principles, non-compliance with which leads to the fact that a man begins to treat his companion more and more every day, until he is faced with the question: does he really need her at all? And, having answered this question honestly to himself, the man leaves. You can accuse him of injustice, callousness, you can even blame the whole world for all mortal sins. But this will not bring back the departed gentleman, and what can you take from men anyway? So let's leave the past and look to the future, bright and lasting relationships.

First and main error, so often allowed by women at the moment when rare meetings develop into cohabitation, is to stop taking care of themselves and caring for themselves the way they did at the dawn of these relationships. Deceived by the feeling that the man is already “yours” and won’t go anywhere (so you can completely trust him to watch you every evening in curlers and a cucumber mask), they risk hitting reality hard at one fine moment.

2. The desire to show care, to make life as easy as possible, to worry and regret loved one. As you might guess, a man’s love is connected with this range of issues. At the same time, if he himself understands that he is very worried about her, that he could not do many things for another woman, realizes how happy he is with her successes and that all this gives him pleasure, then he, of course, really loves.

3. Admiration for your loved one. Of course, this feeling clearly manifests itself at the initial stage of development of events, at the stage of enthusiasm. In turn, the very absence of admiration does not mean a lack of love - it is often associated with some kind of life difficulties or a depressive state.

We have sorted out the male feeling, but how to use this knowledge in practice, what should we “take on board”? Based on the selected components, let's determine for ourselves following rules in relation to a man:

1. Make it clear that he has not conquered you completely and irrevocably.

If you encounter disrespect from her, then either make her respect you or end the relationship. After all, what is happening now will still not lead you to anything good.

Conclusion: emotional satisfaction is when you lose your masculinity and determination, and from it - complete submission and praise of you as an individual. Otherwise, the relationship will fall apart sooner or later.

Don't adjust!

You will repeatedly encounter situations where she will directly or indirectly let you know that she is dissatisfied with your behavior. And if it seems to you that such situations have not arisen, then you simply did not know about them. :)

And when a man begins to adapt to a woman, make excuses to her, ask if he offended her, or ask what happened, then she begins to lose interest in him.

Be a friend to him

It's not just women who need to be heard. Men need this no less. Be interested in his affairs, ask about work, friends, hobbies, plans, successes. But don't overdo it. It shouldn't look like an interrogation. If he doesn’t want to talk about something, don’t intrude, put off questions until next time.

Fear of woman's hysterics.

How afraid he is of this... A woman’s tears greatly depress men - and he is ready to do anything to make sure this ends as soon as possible! Everyone reacts differently: someone gets angry, someone screams, someone does everything to make sure this ends as soon as possible, and someone cries with the woman. A man is afraid to show his weakness in this situation and therefore is ready to make concessions.

Fear of falling in love with a friend's girlfriend.

When a man is shaving and is clearly late for work, don’t run to the bathroom to tell him about it. Don't rummage through the glove compartment of his car as if you want to find something suspicious there. Don't listen to him telephone conversations. Don't try to lure him into the kitchen, don't leave your things in his bathroom as if you were marking your territory. Don't ask him to spend all of his time with you. free time. Don’t say: “I miss you so much” if the man has only been gone for two hours. If you do not listen to my advice, you will unwittingly begin to pursue a man.

Never tell a man: “Button your shirt,” “Wash your hands,” “Brush your hair.” Don't ask him five times if he's hungry, don't offer to put on something warm so he doesn't catch a cold. (However, a little care won’t hurt, since men perceive any runny nose as a fatal disease.)

Don't plan to spend entire weekends together so he doesn't have to ask you for permission to go fishing. Let him catch a few fish. Otherwise, he will start canceling dates. Why? Because the man will begin to behave like a rebellious teenager who wants to assert his “I” in front of his mother. He will do this on purpose, so I don’t advise you to dictate to a man how he should spend his free time.

When you are spending time together and your man feels it is his duty, try to find something that would give him pleasure. If you are sweet and kind, but a man constantly considers himself to be your debtor, your demanding nature takes the relationship several steps back. When you make a man feel like he has to date you, love starts to feel like work to him. When he is not obliged to see you, the same actions are perceived as pleasure.

ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE No. 15

When a woman demands too much from a man, he avoids commitment with all his might. Let him give you what he is willing to give freely and without coercion. And then see what it really is.

Men love challenges. They like to drive fancy cars. They enjoy skydiving and climbing mountains. They love to do the impossible. And when a man perceives meetings with you as something impossible, he becomes much happier. Your dates stop being work for him.

This theory is true for everything else—phone calls, activities together, sex, or a meeting at the end of the day. If you make a man feel like he has plenty of time to do his own things, he will always find time for you. You will become his lover, not his mother. He will perceive you as a privilege and not as an obligation, and then the man will definitely follow you.

No cages

As soon as the man felt vulnerable, he immediately experienced the fear of emotional distress. When he dates a good girl, she symbolizes “forever” to him. God save her from accidentally pronouncing the sacramental word “relationship”! Then she would immediately have to call the emergency services. The man will immediately decide that she is going to lasso him and have children with him. Under no circumstances should you be touched if you accidentally see a charming baby on the street! This will be a mental trauma for your companion. He will begin to have nightmares, and most of all he will think about how to better protect himself.

Sometimes you hear men say: “I want to leave the door open. I don't want to commit myself." Sometimes they find other expressions for this.

ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE No. 16

A bitch always leaves enough space for a man so that he is not afraid to find himself in a cage. And then... he goes out of his way to lure her into the cage.

Yes, men are deathly afraid of losing control and freedom. The thought of living with one woman scares them. If a woman acts from the first moment as if she expects a man to act like a serious contender for her hand, he will get scared and run away. It only takes a few dates with a good girl for a man to feel backed into a corner. And then the “lock” principle is triggered.

And then the irreparable happened. The magic has left the relationship. The man is panicking. He feels like a prisoner, locked in a cramped cell for life. But a bitchy woman will never behave like that. It seems to the man that she is not at all interested in limiting his freedom or chaining him to her forever. This is the main quality that attracts men to bitches. Ask yourself some questions and give honest answers.

How are they not afraid of losing a man or woman? Husband or wife? Take a closer look at yourself. To what extent is your internal personal platform, your basic “I”, regardless of the circumstances in your relationship with your partner? Does your psychic energy flow, as in the case of communicating vessels? When it decreases in one, it increases in the other and vice versa.

It happens that one of the spouses (lovers) plunges into their dark depths, into a period of bad luck. Then the second one lends his shoulder and feels more confident. As soon as the “sufferer” gets out of his misfortunes, the second one gradually loses his confidence. In other words: as soon as you begin to need less support and approval from your partner, he begins to lose you.

If so, this is an alarming signal! Your marriage, love is in danger. There is not enough room in the space of personal feelings for both of you to be strong. Therefore, the history of relationships becomes similar to the “transfusion” of energy from one communicating vessel to another. Sometimes, in order not to lose a loved one, he (s) subconsciously wants trouble to happen to you so that he can become strong. Or maybe you have noticed something similar in yourself?

When you need to be needed, you contribute to the weakness of your chosen one. If he needs you to need him, then he is contributing to your weakness. This is unconscious suppression. However, it can be worse. Conscious suppression also occurs among couples who seek “togetherness.”

So, don't use your partner as a driver and don't let him use you. You won't get that far. You “get attached” to a person, next to whom you can show your best qualities. This means that without it you will not realize yourself, and you will live in fear of losing your source of energy. Therefore, you grab onto him or her with a death grip.
Remember what happens to a drowning man who clings to his savior. They can both go down! Most often this is what happens.

Why don't each of you develop your own ability to swim and float, instead of relying on the other? Why not both become good swimmers? Then fear will lose its meaning.
If you cling to your partner like a drowning man, then he has a desire to push you away - in order to survive. This triggers the self-preservation instinct. But you can’t fight instinct! The tighter you hold on to someone, the more the pushing force increases. This subconscious process is not easy to track when it begins. But once it gains momentum, you can't stop it.

To understand how not to be afraid of losing a man or woman, I do not at all advise you to separate yourself from everyone and cherish your ego. What I am trying to explain to you is that “being yourself” and “being with someone” are not contradictions, but realities that need to be brought into balance. Any imbalance gives rise to problems that destroy the strongest and most reliable feelings. union. If strength and reliability are subjected to constant testing, they may fail. We live in a polar world where absolute strength and absolute reliability do not exist.

When your partner is trying to manipulate you or change you, you will need all the strength to remain yourself and at the same time support good relationship. This way you will save your love union from destruction. If you succumb to outside influence, on the contrary, you will cut the safety rope and fly into the abyss.

How not to lose a man or woman?

Here's what you should pay attention to in your life together:

• Spouses often focus on each other's shortcomings, instead of developing their own strengths and those of the person with whom you are in a relationship.
• Your personal ability to think, feel and act on your own is largely shaped by your parents. You tend to copy your parents, even if you do not consider them a worthy role model.
• The hope that your spouse will tear you out of the matrix of the parental nest is usually not justified. It is his (her) desire to do this that will create problems.
• The opinion that you are “more advanced” than your partner is most likely a fantasy that you indulge yourself in, and a real threat of losing the person forever. When you admit that you are on approximately the same level, it will be easier for you to see what emotions, reproaches and demands you exchange.
• Standing up for your own interests in marriage and intimacy, rather than constantly sacrificing them for the sake of others, will make you happier.
• Your evaluation should not be based on what others think or feel about you! The main criterion is your own opinion about yourself, namely your feelings and sensations. Stop looking at yourself in the distorting mirror called “OTHERS”. Whoever these “OTHERS” are - parents, spouse, lover, girlfriend or boyfriend.

The surest way to not be afraid of losing a man or woman is to become more individual, this is the best thing you can do for yourself and those you love. The paradox is: the more individual, the more separated you are from others, the higher the prospect for true unity. Not only on the everyday, sexual, love, but also on the spiritual level!

Stay with me and I will reveal many more secrets to you.

Updated: March 29, 2017 by: Alina

Share this article with your friends - and you will definitely get credit for it!)

You may be interested in these articles:

What's happened romantic love? How to maintain romance in marriage and love? Psychology of relationships in marriage - how to behave with your partner? How to maintain a relationship with your loved one for life?