How to choose the right husband. Practical advice
Every woman dreams of becoming the wife of a man who will be her faithful friend, an excellent lover and a reliable protector all her life.
Unfortunately, many girls make the mistake of not finding out all the necessary information about the groom before the wedding.
So that there are no bitter disappointments in living together you need to follow the advice on how to choose a husband.
What is his family like?
Many values are passed down to a person from his parents. It often happens that the father's behavior in the family becomes an example for the son. And he, having become a husband, will behave the same way with his wife.
Since childhood, a child develops a certain family model, and he no longer understands how people can live differently. Therefore, if his father loves and respects your potential mother-in-law, then this increases your chances of creating a strong family.
To answer your question of how to choose the right husband, you should take a closer look at how his relatives behave in difficult situations. Do they solve problems together or put troubles on the shoulders of one person?
After all, the years spent in a family leave an imprint for life. Also analyze the attitude of your father-in-law and mother-in-law towards you. The husband's parents often become the cause of scandals in a young family.
Friends
The next thing that should interest you when choosing a husband is his friends. In a man's life they occupy far from last place. Therefore, take a close look at his surroundings.
Perhaps most of them are revelers or convinced bachelors or, conversely, intelligent family people. Do his comrades have an excessive desire to drink alcohol or commit crimes? Study his immediate surroundings and draw conclusions for yourself. How to choose a husband? Get to know his inner circle!
Attitude to money
No matter how much anyone claims that money is not the most important thing in life, it is because of it that families often break up.
Think about whether the candidate for the role of your husband is ready to try to provide for himself and your family?
Or does he just like to lie on the couch, sipping beer? Is he capable of saving money, or does he spend every penny?
You can think as much as you like that a husband cannot be chosen by calculation. However, whether you will be behind him like behind a stone wall is clear now. He doesn't have to give you expensive gifts, but taking care of you will demonstrate his willingness to protect and protect you.
Pay special attention to whether the man is gambling. If he plays, then be prepared for the fact that all your family budget one day it may disappear in one evening.
Genetics and health
Before choosing a husband, you need to make sure that there are no genetic diseases in his family. This may sound indecent, but for the sake of the health of your future children, you must know the answer to this question.
Of course, you shouldn’t ask a man about this from the first days of dating and demand medical certificates from him. Wait until your relationship reaches a more trusting level.
Then try to carefully find out information about the health status of him and those close to him. Just do it delicately so as not to offend the person with such questions.
So that the family boat does not crash in everyday life
One of common reasons The breakdown of marriages are domestic issues. Agree that life with a man who is not able to hammer a nail into a wall is quite difficult. In this case, you will decide all such issues in the house.
Therefore, by taking a closer look at how a man behaves in everyday life, you will understand whether you can rely on him in household matters. If you live separately, pay him a couple of surprise visits and evaluate the situation in his apartment.
To make sure that the candidate for the role of your husband is an economic person, ask him to do any housework. For example, hang a mirror in the bathroom, knock out a carpet or nail a shelf in the hallway.
Monitor the response to your request. If he doesn’t refuse, but does the job efficiently and with pleasure, then you don’t have to worry about how to choose a husband. He passed an important test.
Hobbies
There is an opinion that opposites attract. However, this happens very rarely in life. For example, if you like everything of your own free time spend in front of the computer or TV, and your man cannot imagine a weekend without long walks and sports, one of you will have to adapt to your partner.
Otherwise, you will have to rest apart. Therefore, choose a husband with the same interests as yours.
Intimate relationships
There is nothing complicated here: if you suit each other in bed, then you are suitable for each other sexually. If you are not compatible in this matter, it is better not to go too far in such a relationship.
Sexual desire is a natural need. Therefore, to think that a person can adjust and pretend all his life is very stupid. In a family where the husband’s attitude towards sex is significantly different from the wife’s, sooner or later disagreements begin, leading to pleasures on the side.
Philosophy of life
Answer a few questions for yourself about your future husband, and you will understand whether you are choosing the right person.
- What is he aiming for?
- What is he afraid of?
- How do you cope with difficulties?
- What is important to him?
- What are his ideals?
Focus on the goals that the man sets for himself. Does he strive for personal development, creating a family and home? If your desires coincide, then you are on your way.
But if life values yours are different, he is unlikely to be suitable for the role of a husband. In this case, it is better to let this person go and go your own way.
Ancient knowledge
Some women find it difficult to understand on their own how to choose a husband, and they turn to the Vedas for help. Fans of Vedic culture try to make sure that their decisions are correct by studying scriptures about the nature of man and his soul.
Having made their choice, they develop relationships based on the knowledge they gleaned from the Vedas. If a man is also interested in Vedic culture, there will be mutual understanding in such a family.
When you are looking for a husband, do not idealize every man who pays attention to you. You should only start a family with a person you love and trust.
17.05.2017 04:39:31
Let's continue the conversation on the topic, and today I will give you some practical tips on how to choose the right husband.
You will learn what qualities a man must have to become a worthy life partner.
And you will also understand what qualities an enviable bride must have in order to be asked to marry the best grooms in the city!
Before getting married, the Enviable Bride should ask the man where they will live, what they will eat, and how he plans to provide for the family.
If a man has a weak understanding, it is better not to start a family with him, otherwise there will be many problems in family life.
There are guys (and sometimes, unfortunately, girls) who really naively believe that they can live well and comfortably in their parents’ apartment. That the young wife will be completely happy listening to recommendations on household organization and cooking from her mother-in-law, and that she will not climb the walls out of grief. And her nerves will remain in perfect order, and she will not growl at her newly-made husband because of this state of affairs...
Well, then, when the wife begins to growl at her husband, he decides that he got a bad wife, angry and always dissatisfied with something. I wonder what? And why she is dissatisfied - he will never understand, since his understanding is weak...
There are guys who for some reason are sure that if they and their young wife are financially dependent on their parents, they won’t get on their nerves because of this, and they won’t interfere in their relationship either, and the family will live happily ever after, without quarreling at all...
Why do they think so?
Because the understanding is weak, and the guy cannot understand that the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in the same kitchen are putting a knife to the throat of the young wife. But you can’t love a knife, you can only fear and hate it...
It is possible to love your husband’s mother, and even very possible. True, for this the conditions must be appropriate.
Yes, there are ideal relationships between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and even in the same kitchen. But for this, the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law themselves need to have a holy angelic character. Have you seen such people? I didn't see it. I suspect that they may live somewhere in the temples of Tibet, or live as hermits somewhere else. They don’t need to cook pasta and fry cutlets, they feed on the Holy Spirit - that’s why they don’t have such problems :). If your future mother-in-law is not a saint, it is better not to have any illusions that you can make a holy woman out of her. You shouldn't be so naive.
Therefore, before marrying a guy who lives with his mother, you need to think ten times: can you withstand all these trials that will befall you because your husband did not have time to grow up, and whether you will have enough endurance and self-control one day don't hit it with a frying pan...
Girls, keep in mind: if you marry a homeless guy and he puts you up with your mother-in-law, you will deprive yourself of a huge amount female happiness. There will be no desire to clean the apartment, and in general there will be no particular desire to be in this apartment.
Yes, of course, you can learn to live well with your mother-in-law, and even with your drunk neighbors in the dorm, and even endure a lot of inconveniences in life, and at the same time be happy and contented.
Yes, this is indeed possible when a woman is married, and the family experiences various misfortunes and inconveniences. A woman is able to remain satisfied with her husband, and at the same time continue to inspire him.
But when you are still a “marriageable bride”, it is better not to be stupid, not to be cheap, and to choose your husband as best as possible. Since not only your future fate, but also the fate of your children will depend on this.
After all, choosing a spouse is not choosing a partner for the night. You will have to live with this person all your life, raise children, which means you need to approach choosing a husband very seriously.
Unfortunately, many girls decide to get married just because they fell in love. And when children appear, resentment towards the husband and fate appears... But then why be offended? After all, she chose her husband...
How much should your fiance and future husband earn?
So much so that you have the opportunity to buy an apartment (for example, save up for it over several years), and at the same time live without denying yourself anything (within reasonable limits, of course). That is, a woman should be able to eat well, buy normal cosmetics, clothes, etc.
Of course, to live a full life, you don’t have to earn millions and billions, although I don’t see anything wrong with large sums of money - if a person knows how to manage it correctly. If your husband, for example, is a brilliant builder and can build you a beautiful house with his own hands, this is also an excellent option.
In my life I have seen families where the man himself built the house. The house, of course, has all the amenities and a decent renovation. These men do not earn millions, but they live a full family life without mothers-in-law.
By the way, one of these men does not even work as a builder, but as a salesman. At the same time, he regularly hacks something and brings decent money into the house. His wife is very feminine and constantly admires her husband's abilities.
Every woman needs her own man. This statement is certainly true.
A naive fool is looking for a husband, for example, in nightclubs. Her main criterion when choosing a groom is his coolness appearance and the ability to have fun. And she finds a guy who has been relaxing and partying too much and becomes very attached to this life of leisure and entertainment.
When does a guy really like nightclubs and restaurants? When he believes that “this” is happiness (the meaning of life). I drank beer - good! Went to the pub - even better! And then in the “night light” - absolutely beautiful!
When a girl starts living with such a “whore,” it turns out that this guy likes to hang out most of all, and he doesn’t want to do anything else. Naturally, he doesn’t know how to earn decent money, no matter what. men's affairs he doesn’t want to do anything in the form of building stools and his own house. He loves children only in pictures, and he’s heard about poopy diapers, but he always naively believed that these were fairy tales and in real life they simply don't exist.
Of course, before the start of family life, he, enchanted by his sweet chosen one, will tell her a lot about what a wonderful husband he will be, how he will do everything wonderfully and fulfill a man’s duties. He will even promise to never be angry with his wife and always be happy with her. But when a year later his love passes and a child appears, who, as you know, by means of a cry notifies that he needs to be looked after very well 24 hours a day, the dad is hanging out... He is the one family life I imagined it completely differently, everything was like in a wonderful Hollywood film... but here...
He no longer wants sex with his wife, which means his family doesn’t support him. And his meaning in life has always been to go and hang out... So he leaves the family... to hang out.
A person cannot live without meaning. That's why he will always come back to him. And therefore, before you get married, PAY close attention to WHAT your chosen one considers to be his meaning in life.
And please pay attention not to what he SAYS, but to what he DOES!
An intelligent woman understands perfectly well that you need to look for a husband not by his words, but by his deeds, and look, first of all, at how he lives in real life.
If a man is able to get real joy and pleasure from working with his hands, that’s great. The likelihood that the family will live richly is quite high, and correct behavior the wife's family will really be successful.
If a man is able to get real joy and pleasure from working with his hands and head, that’s generally wonderful. This means that the family will live even richer and more successful.
If a man works more with his tongue, and the real products of his labor are not visible, it is better to erase this man from your life.
If a person does not know how to get joy and pleasure from working with his hands and head, and he has no intention of learning to get pleasure from it, he will most likely never want to do anything with his mind and hands. Who needs such a husband? That's right, no one!
You wouldn't even wish this on your enemy.
Where does a smart woman look for a husband?
Among active and busy people. It is very easy to find a worthy life partner by doing journalism, and many of our female cadets have already proven this.
After all, a journalist has the opportunity to have a good conversation with a man in his work environment, find out how he achieved success, what character traits contributed to this, and so on and so forth. And there is also a great opportunity to find out how a man likes to spend his free time - reading smart books, playing sports and developing his skills in doing business, or hanging out in clubs with girls and drinking alcoholic beverages in immoderate quantities...
Again, if a girl does not have an understanding of men, and she does not understand them at all (as we know, this includes more than 80% of women), then she has a unique opportunity to meet and communicate with a good hundred, or even more men of different levels development and material wealth.
After a cadet completes a journalism assignment completely and correctly (as written in the course assignments), she develops such a vision of men that she only needs to look into a man’s eyes, say a couple of phrases, and she already sees what and how a man is lives and how much he earns.
Experience is experience. This means that when choosing a life partner, she will not be mistaken...
About journalism
Readers who want to enroll in the course often write to me and say that they are afraid of this task. “I’m afraid to interview the best grooms in the city!”
Why shouldn't you be afraid? Because I created this task for complete dummies. And over the years of working with female cadets, we were able to develop it in such a way that it’s not scary to do it at all!
At first you just learn how to charm cats and dogs.
Try a simple experiment:
Go to any cat. Look at her kindly, tell her something nice. Pat him on the back. If a cat starts to fawn on you, know that you have unlimited charming abilities! And if you completed this task, you can also complete the journalism task.
You will just go through it, gradually making the task more difficult for yourself. First she charmed the cat, then the dog, then she talked to the neighbor’s grandmother... And so after a couple of tens simple actions you will understand that you are not at all afraid to charm anyone :).
Read the reviews of our cadets on social networks or our blog. And you will see that they all started with cats and ended up as millionaires who ask them to marry. For example, a success story
And you can do it too. You have every right to become an enviable bride!
Every woman needs a soul mate to create a family and have children. Previously, the responsibility for choosing a husband for their daughter fell entirely on the shoulders of the parents, but such an important factor as the presence of feelings was not taken into account. Now a woman is free to choose her life partner. We all know that love is irrational, and at the peak of emotions you can't do anything right. right choice. Love is wonderful, but marriage is long-term and serious.
How to choose the right husband so that he suits you as a spouse and at the same time becomes a good father - the women's site will tell you about this today.
How to choose a husband: 10 things to pay attention to
Suppose there is already a potential candidate for your hand and heart. In general, you feel warm feelings and interest in him.
However, if you want strong and happy family, you will have to use attentiveness and analyze how suitable it is for you. You won’t get far on your own; there must be mutual understanding, respect and similar interests in the family.
So, what do you need to pay attention to in order to choose the right husband:
1. Take a closer look at his family
We adopt a lot from the lifestyle of our parents, because children from an early age imitate their elders and learn from them. If you want to better know and understand the man you are interested in, get to know his family.
Looking at the relationship between his relatives, you can understand what model of family behavior is embedded in it. Values such as respect for elders, mutual assistance, respect for women, and the habit of sharing are most often instilled by parents. If in his family they are considered the norm, then there is a high probability of transferring these values to your future family.
2. Compare your social statuses
Modern history knows episodes in which a woman simultaneously received a prince, a horse, and half a kingdom in addition! 😉 But still unequal status is one of the reasons for divorce, psychologists say.
Social misalliance can lead to one partner being ashamed of the other if he “falls short.” Moreover, we're talking about not only about financial situation, but also about the level of culture, belonging to different nations and religions.
Any misalliance can cause difficulties in relationships. Try to choose a person close to you in social status.
3. Attitude towards children
Interesting fact: a female mouse chooses a spouse based on the degree of his caring towards the offspring! And that’s right, you also need a man who will take responsibility for raising children equally with you!
But how to choose a husband who is ready for fatherhood? Not all men dare to talk about this directly. However warm relationships with little nephews and godchildren will speak for themselves. And if they are not there, have your friend invite you both to a noisy children's party. That's where you will see his real attitude towards children!
4. Genetic approach
Unfortunately, we cannot do without a pragmatic approach, if you want to give birth to healthy offspring. When your relationship becomes more trusting, ask if your chosen one or his relatives have chronic diseases, does he often get sick (is his immunity strong), does he play sports?
Few people can boast of a complete absence of diseases, but the habit of taking care of one’s health is already a good sign of a responsible and adult person!
5. Similarity of interests, hobbies and everyday behavior
They say that opposites attract, but they may soon push away because they can't find things to do together. If his ultimate dream is to sit in front of the TV, and you need to climb mountains with a backpack on your shoulders, then you will inevitably spend time separately.
There is no need to strive for absolute similarity of interests when choosing the right husband. It's good if you have a couple of common hobbies, and just as many different ones. This way you can have fun together, but at the same time not lose your social circle and share different impressions.
It is very important to see how a man behaves in everyday life, because this is where married couples often stumble. Are you neat and accustomed to household responsibilities? The best way to find out - come to visit without an invitation :)
6. Sexual temperament
Tested only experimentally! The main requirement is that there is mutual inexhaustible pleasure!
7. Attitude towards money
The site knows for sure: a man’s attitude towards money can tell a lot about his character. It’s very flattering if he’s willing to spend his entire salary on you in an expensive restaurant, but The head of the family should have a responsible and careful attitude towards money.
Observe:
- does it save receipts after purchase?
- does he compare prices when choosing a product?
- does he plan?
- Does it have a cash airbag?
- is he involved in investing?
8. Attitude to life
Silent question: how to choose a husband if he does not want to be a husband?
Before making your final decision, make sure your a man clearly knows what he wants in this life. Find out his plans for the future, what he is striving for, does he want to develop as a person? Does he need a family?
If your life attitudes intersect, which means you can move forward together. If not - let go and leave the person his right to live the way he wants. Don't expect that you can rehabilitate him.
9. Social circle
“Tell me who your friend is, and I will tell you who you are!” Did he introduce you to his friends? Look at them as closely as you would at your family.
Who are they? Restless bachelors or married people? Do they just require attention or help? Are they treating you with respect? Draw your conclusions!
10. You yourself
You can’t do without reflections! It is impossible to choose the right husband without understanding what you yourself imagine next to him. If he makes you happy, inspires you, if next to him you become better and develop, which means he has every chance of becoming your life partner! This item alone is worth the nine described above!
Alas, suitable husbands are not lying around on the road - that’s a fact! However, there is no need to live by psychological portraits created in your head, because we all have shortcomings and there are no ideal people (and especially husbands :)
Strive to meet these points, work on yourself, and for each good wife There will certainly be a good husband! The women's site site wishes you this from the bottom of my heart!
--
Julia Caesar - specially for the site www.site - Beautiful and Successful
Copying this article is prohibited!
Communication specialist and interpersonal relationships Steve Nakamoto knows what women want and can answer many of their questions. He tells you how to weed out unsuitable candidates and how to choose the right man for your family.
Honest male gaze: Your personal life will not work out if you choose the wrong partner. In addition to mutual attraction, you need to consider other factors to understand whether a person is suitable or not suitable for you for a long-term relationship.
Before giving in to emotions, be sure to evaluate the psychological maturity of your prospective partner, your compatibility, the degree of mutual attraction and the possibility of personal development. Otherwise, you will be faced with a relationship that will suit neither him nor you.
A wise woman will choose a winner over a loser if she wants to have every chance of success in a love relationship. Of course, there are a lot of more subtle variables that you can pay attention to when choosing the right man in each individual situation, but nevertheless, men have some common traits, the presence of which will most likely lead to complete failure in a relationship. It is these traits that you must distinguish first of all, so as not to waste time on someone who will not become a winner for you.
separate the winners from the losers
Thanks to the convenience and popularity of online dating, some women are meeting more seemingly worthy men than ever before. After all, it’s not at all difficult for a man to create an attractive profile and maintain a pleasant conversation in real time. A wise woman who is looking for true love, understands that based on such communication it is very difficult to determine who is in front of her - a winner or a loser.
One girl recently wrote to me about this: “What does it mean when a guy says he likes me, but he doesn’t feel the spark? A young man I’ve been dating for several months said at the very beginning of our relationship that we were strongly attracted to each other, but now he says that’s nonsense. What does he imply? Does he like me or not?
Very often, a woman, describing her affair, asks me if the man she is dating is interested in her. Of course, assessing a man's interest in a woman is a primary task, but every time I remind my readers that it is equally important to determine whether this man a specific woman.
By assessing whether a man is genuinely interested in you and whether he is a good match, you will be less likely to fall in love with the wrong person and will ultimately avoid disappointment and failure in your relationship.
Don't count on people changing!
Avoiding unsuitable candidates is no easy task. Because most of us are so hopeful for love and so rarely meet potential lovers along the way, many strive to take advantage of almost every romantic opportunity that comes their way.
Several years ago I was introduced to a nice girl who was fourteen years younger than me. I remember once hearing her say to a friend, “Steve is a great guy, he has so much to offer.” This was especially true of the young people who surrounded her. But it didn't take long for her to see me in the best light - a mature, calm, financially reliable person.
During " honeymoon During our communication, it seemed to her that I was the embodiment of the best masculine qualities. But after a month this young lady began to perceive me completely differently. My “maturity” began to remind her of “Daddy’s” behavior. I was no longer “calm” but “lazy, old and tired.” And “financial stability” turned into “stinginess” and “the pursuit of money.”
Looking back, I can say that the difference in age, interests and life goals made me a disastrous candidate for this girl. It is not surprising that after two months of communication we broke up.
Avoid unsuitable candidates
It is important to remember that people rarely change. Therefore, it is prudent to evaluate your possible partner based more on who he is at the moment, and not on who he will become in the future. Due to the very nature of romantic relationships, we easily get carried away and throw ourselves into the abyss of momentary passion, without paying attention to such important long-term issues as compatibility and the possibility of personal development. But wise women carefully evaluate these aspects at the beginning of the game, before they develop serious feelings for a man. This way you can avoid a long relationship with the wrong person.
Beware of men with bad habits . If your prospective partner suffers from a chronic drug, alcohol, or gambling addiction, a smart solution is to avoid being romantically involved with them. Bad habits control a person’s life and the lives of those around him. Many women have already acquired this painful experience by wasting time, energy, and feelings on unworthy candidates.
Avoid men with serious character flaws. Character is the foundation of every personality. This is the result of hundreds of decisions made that gradually made a person what he is now. Today, many women are increasingly meeting men with obvious character flaws, which, of course, cannot serve as a reliable support for love. Character is something that is formed over a long time, and it is very difficult to change it. Therefore, a wise woman would rather avoid close communication with men who have obvious character flaws than try to correct them.
Walk past men who don't have an ounce of ambition. For many women, this trait does not seem to be as big a drawback as others. But at the same time, a woman quickly gets tired of a man who does not know ambition. Not striving for anything, such a man does not particularly care about the material wealth of the family, which is an important cause of stress in relationships. A wise woman must distinguish a man who is in harmony with himself from a man who is simply lazy and unmotivated, who will probably bore her over time.
Don't date men who don't turn you on. In a romantic relationship, there is no substitute for attraction or physical attraction. If attraction does not come, it is better to refuse further rapprochement. Otherwise, you will get stuck in a relationship without passion that will not satisfy either partner.
Say “No!” vile men. Women are often confused by men who are affectionate one moment and hostile the next. Many women at the initial stage of a relationship focus on positive qualities and turn a blind eye to negative ones. When you communicate with a two-faced man, sooner or later he will direct his aggression towards you.
Rate men based on their social circle. For many women this is a difficult task. For some reason, they want to believe that her lover is not at all like his friends. But, most likely, he just wants to seem better. In fact, he is probably a lot like his friends. Consider this instead of relying entirely on his “advertising image.”
Avoid men who are completely out of sync with your personality. Some people just can't seem to get along. Instead of complementing each other and mutually supporting them, they quarrel over various trifles and bring out only the worst sides in each other. If you find yourself in such a difficult situation, assess the situation soberly. Don't make the mistake of trying to improve your relationship by, for example, marrying someone who constantly upsets you.
Beware of extreme differences in lifestyle. Lifestyle manifests itself in the clothes we wear, the music we listen to, the things we buy, the food we choose, the words we speak, the dreams we strive for, the friends we choose, the activities to which we devote our free time. If you want to commit your life to someone, it is wise to find a partner who shares your habits and views. People whose way of life differs from ours undoubtedly add color and diversity, but, as a rule, communication and friendship with these people must be limited.
Be able to recognize potential conflicts of values. Values such as courage, love, honesty and family are ideals for which we have the utmost respect. When two people don't have common values, they often upset each other. For example, I was told about one woman who complained that her husband was constantly getting drunk with his boyfriends instead of doing something more suitable for him. family man. Such conflicts of responsibility and entertainment take a long time to brew and are often hidden until they develop into feelings of deep resentment. A woman who is looking for a new partner should avoid men who clearly do not share her values. Values, which are essentially deep-rooted priorities, can only change under the influence of very serious circumstances.
Stay away from men with unclear relationship goals. It’s easy to fall for the bait of a man who claims that he loves children, but only shows this love towards other people’s children. A wise woman must distinguish between mere talk about marriage and family from a real willingness to make a commitment. True, some men openly say that they do not intend to start a family, and do not hide their aspirations for other goals. But a woman may fall into the misconception that such a person will change over time, and later discover that in fact his views on his personal life have long been firmly established. A wise woman carefully evaluates a man's life priorities and continues the relationship only if their goals coincide.
Men who are willing to date only occasionally are suitable for women with the same aspirations. As practice shows, expecting a person to change is in most cases useless.
Having comprehensively assessed candidates for the role of a permanent partner, a wise woman will choose the man who has the highest chance of bringing victory to their love relationship. To do this, you first need to weed out the obvious losers.
: Determine right now what you don't want
Try to think of men in your life who fit the descriptions in this chapter. Perhaps you dated some of them for a long time, some you just know, some your friends talked to, and some are a world-famous personality: a politician, athlete, musician, TV presenter or film actor.
It is important to paint yourself a clear image of a candidate who is not suitable for you. This way you will be able to quickly, in the early stages, analyze your potential partners.
Conclusion:
How to choose a husband and not make a mistake? You're unlucky in love when you're dating the wrong person. But if a healthy relationship develops between two emotionally mature people who experience a strong mutual attraction and are truly suitable for each other, you will certainly be lucky in love!
Articles “How to choose the right man”
Relevant at all times. Especially today, when young girls, sometimes, simply have no one to teach them how to choose a husband, because... their mothers (first teachers) often suffer from this problem themselves, but their mothers (now grandmothers) did not teach them how to choose a husband what a husband should be like.
How to choose the right husband
So, how to choose the right husband for a long life together, what a girl, a future bride, needs to know and do.
Choosing a spouse is a rather difficult task; you cannot rely completely on feelings (they may not be real). Feelings and love are, of course, good, but you can’t do without reason, a cold mind, because... life does not consist of only feelings..., after all, there is a lot of rationality in it...
If you decide to connect your life with a man, it doesn’t matter whether you sign or live in civil marriage, and at the same time you act only on the basis of your feelings and fabulous expectations (maybe your hidden, unconscious desires), then the probability that you “got in” is 80-90 percent.
To clearly understand whether a guy or a man is right for you for marriage and further life with him, you need to analyze yourself, him, and your relationships and interactions.
What you need to analyze to choose a good husband
To choose a good husband worthy of you, or rather, what suits you: your desires, needs and expectations, you need:1) Determine your and his basic temperament (pass the Eysenck test) or observe yourself and your future husband in various situations, paying attention to the speed (pace) of thinking, actions, emotionality... (is there a correspondence or complement to each other, compatibility of temperaments )…
2) Determine your and his character accentuation (Leonhard test). Analyze similarities, complements and differences... (determine character), pass (marital compatibility test)
3) Determine your and his expectations and needs in life together. Do they coincide with you, or complement each other?
4) Pay attention to the congruence (proportionality) of psycho-emotional exchange in your relationship. Those. according to the principle: as much as you give, you get back as much. Otherwise, emotional hunger will come, accompanied by resentment, jealousy, guilt and other negative and unnatural feelings (they are not innate) and, sometimes, inappropriate behavior.
5) Most people wear socio-psychological masks, often without realizing it, which is why first sympathy, like first love (perhaps not love, but a neurotic, anxious attachment), is often so deceptive. The best way to see a person outside the mask is to carefully observe him when he is intoxicated, when the censorship of conscience, morality and ethics is removed. However, it should be kept in mind that intoxication is different from intoxication, and such an analysis cannot be completely trusted...
These are the main, primary analytical actions when choosing a future husband.
Most exact result, finding out how to choose the right husband is a psychoanalysis of your life scenarios written in childhood. Here you need to pay attention to the family of your chosen one, a couple of knees back, to the grandparents on both lines (paternal and maternal). Especially, you should pay attention to the grandfather of the future husband on the maternal side (it’s not for nothing that in the old days, they always found out what family a person was from).
Also, you should keep in mind that your husband does not necessarily have a negative scenario; you may have it too. Usually, people get together unconsciously, based on suitable or complementary scenarios, including in order to later get divorced. This, of course, sounds somewhat irrational, but it is a fact.
If in your relationship similar situations are repeated several times (at least two), for example, quarreled-reconciled, kicked out-left-came-took back, insulted-offended-apologized-forgave, hit-apologized-forgave, cheated-asked for forgiveness, crying swore, forgave..., i.e. some vicious circle, then this is clearly a playful, scripted relationship. The result of such games is, at best, divorce and emotional suffering.
It may turn out that almost no one is suitable for you at all, and you you can't choose a husband on your own, then you need to focus on your own “I” and change something in it.