Psychology of a married lover and its features
A significant part of the female population completely refutes the possibility of a rendezvous with a married man, considering such relationships to be initially deadly for the soul and their own pride. But there are a considerable number of ladies who not only accept such a development of events, but also purposefully strive for just such a scenario. Putting aside hypocrisy and feigned pride, one can understand the very essence of the phenomenon.
Description of the problem
The psychology of a married lover compares favorably with the behavior of an inveterate bachelor or a conscientious family man, and therefore lends itself to full analysis by a sober-minded lady. Most wives, who have learned from their own experience the problem of triangular ups and downs, consider the main reason for their husband’s infidelity to be the polygamy inherent in them (popularly referred to as “getting mad”). In fact, the root of the problem may be hidden behind a screen of psychological disorders.
Problems are the root of betrayal
A common root cause of infidelity is problematic parental relationships:
- A child can constantly be a participant in parental swearing, during which the most unpleasant incidents from their private life are revealed. The result of such a “happy” childhood will be the inability to perceive family conflicts. In his own family, an adult man in moments of acute situations will subconsciously seek refuge, where he is accepted with his whole basket of bad habits and shortcomings. Skillful mistresses build their own behavior precisely on this foundation - the more demanding the spouse, the more loyal the passion from the outside.
- Parents, busy with social and work activities, forget to open their souls to their child. Lack of respect, sudden changes in the family climate and unexplained actions instill the concept of artificiality into the fragile child's mind. Marital fidelity does not receive clear boundaries and any difficulties undermine the already unstable peace of the family.
- Unsuccessful first sexual experience. Many do not accept the possibility that the psychology of a married lover directly depends on the behavior of the first woman. In the case when a girl openly expressed dissatisfaction, especially in the form of bullying, the man’s subconscious is constantly in a state of searching for confirmation of his own status. Mistresses are often more talkative in bed, having analyzed the possible needs of a married suitor, clearly build a line of encouragement and, if successful, glorify his masculine potential.
- The child absorbed the example of a weak father. There are often cases when a boy was brought up under the strict control of his mother, who clearly laid out the line of matriarchy. An adult man is no longer able to move away from an oppressive relationship, so the mistress acts more like a sexual psychologist. Having discussed his own troubles and the futility of married life with a beautiful woman, a married lover reinforces all conclusions with rich love joys, which allows him to continue to humiliate himself in the circle of his own family.
Behavior model
The psychology of a married lover in relation to his mistress gradually develops a pattern of behavior. The first experience of a forbidden relationship programs a man to constantly monitor the speech, movements and places of possible deployment of his mistress. The city in which the married hero lives with his mistress, day after day turns into a map with minefields. A man tries his best not to get caught on the arm of his wife in the eyes of his passion and vice versa. For some guys, this kind of situation gives some positive results: the brain calculates moves in advance, attentiveness increases several times.
Model of behavior of a “stray” married partner
There is a more common type of unfaithful men at the moment - the “stray” young married lover. His psychology of betrayal is quite simple - the wife confronted him with the fact of her own pregnancy, and the marriage was formed around the existing heir or heiress. The strength of such bonds is rather doubtful. A man, with his tummy pressed against the wall, sees his wife as a warden rather than as his faithful soul mate. Therefore, the appearance of a light and cheerful outlet on the side is a completely adequate reaction.
Many girls who set sail on the “marriage” river with just such rights often place all responsibility for the birth of the baby on their spouse. But pressure in the form of barbs or jokes only leads to the desire to gain balance; girls on the side in this case are a means to gain the missing dominance. The psychology of a married man with a mistress is distinguished by its stable state. The disadvantaged individual, who finally has the opportunity to receive dosed bursts without accompanying moralizing or blackmail, notes an improvement in well-being, an influx of energy and aspirations, as well as an influx of physical strength.
Changes in a married lover
A man strives to match his well-groomed lover. The wife’s favorite pies are swept aside, but baked meat is only welcome. This is the psychology of a married man; they have a very significant difference from their wives - they have their own, they have a separate circle of friends, unfamiliar affairs and successes. The wife is always trampling underfoot, worrying about her family and children, grumbling about her mother-in-law and colleagues. You can always put pressure on your missus or make demands; your mistress can fly away on vital matters at any moment. The moment of lack of influence gives any man a feeling of ardent thirst, attracting him more and more.
If both partners are married...
There is also an option when married lovers and mistresses meet. The psychology of these relationships goes beyond a simple craving for novelty. A married lady not only indulges in adultery, she gives a piece of her own soul to her lover, taking it away from her family.
Why does a married lady have a married partner?
For women, the bonds of marriage are not empty words, even in the case of a fictitious union (by convenience or contract). Several factors can make a girl decide to have a forbidden relationship:
- Dissatisfaction with your own libido. Often seemingly prosperous married couples hide a deep conflict of sexual temperaments. If a woman has a more active position and desires for regular sexual activity and does not receive a response from her husband, thoughts about an additional place of intimate release gradually ripen in her psyche.
- The husband's sexual coercion also leads to the search for a more suitable partner. In a situation where a spouse aggressively promotes his own hidden fantasies, without caring about the emotional peace of his wife, he encounters a wall of not only misunderstanding, but also hysterical jitters. The best solution for most women is the presence of a married lover. After all, the existence of a spouse completely frees one from any obligations to a suitor.
- Lack of quality attention from the faithful. Without an emotional dialogue with their spouse, women most often withdraw into their own complexes and grievances; attention from a strange man feeds their ego.
What are relationships built on?
The psychology of a married lover in relation to his married mistress is built on quite tangible supports. The main one is the complete adaptation of the new passion to one’s own fate. A married lady, in fact, is a universal cocktail that gives pleasure and confidence in a man’s capabilities, and at the same time does not show a harmful passion for ringing. A pleasant bonus is complete harmony in terms of timing. Over time, a free lover will demand more attention to herself, while a married woman approaches the issue more thoughtfully, calculating all possible options.
The complete absence of trivial promises and vows qualitatively saturates the relationship of married lovers. The psychology of both parties is such that wild delight and the desire to suppress the partner are absent.
Why choose a married woman as a mistress?
Thanks to beneficial harmony, a relationship with a married woman is complemented by purely external factors. Such a lady completely rejects going out to crowded places and does not require pretentious parties, frisky races or spa resorts. The list of waste of a married man is qualitatively reduced and easily fits into it, especially if his legal wife scrupulously controls him. Men are also attracted to the relaxedness of married mistresses.
Animal interest in the forbidden ripens on both sides, giving the intimate relationship a “tasty” spice. The psychology of a married lover is built on the same classical laws - when one’s wife constantly talks about her age (both in social matters and in bed), the ego demands the satisfaction of the most ambiguous desires.
Ideal for both partners
In some situations, a married lover becomes a lifeline for single mothers. Over the years, loneliness puts forward a whole list of positive aspects of this phenomenon. Legal husbands often disappoint with their tyranny towards their spouse or child, so a married lover will not take educational initiatives towards the child, and will not tighten the atmosphere in the house. Rare visits also look tempting - a single mother does not often manage to set aside an hour or two for herself, so such a partner will not issue ultimatums.
Women believe that a married lover can help financially. The psychology of a man who has experienced the complexities of everyday life is such that he compromises more easily, he has to ask less often, a casually thrown phrase or a sigh evokes in such a partner a reflex developed in his life together with his wife.
Married lover: psychology, divorce
Over the past three decades, a different trend in such relations has been widespread. Many girls dream of finding a well-rounded man; most often a married lover suits them for the role of admirer. They plan to win such a partner, to conquer him. As a result, he will file for divorce from his missus. Thus, young and overly ambitious ladies want to get not just a win, but a universal jackpot.
The appearance of a younger or more experienced woman in the life of a spouse in most cases indicates stagnation in relation to the couple. Psychologists advise getting to the core of the problem before taking radical measures and sanctions. Family life is not just labor-intensive and painstaking, but also omnipresent. Any man needs frequent bursts of seething passions that would allow him to balance the emotional world with the external one.