My husband left for someone else but is not getting a divorce. He left. How to survive a breakup with your loved one

Unfortunately, statistics say that there are more and more divorces every year. Every second marriage, according to experts, breaks up. The largest number of divorces occurs in the 3rd, 6th and 9th years of cohabitation.

It is believed that Jupiter is responsible for marriage and family. Every three years, starting from the date of marriage, it tests your union for strength, influencing your family from an unfavorable angle of its energetic influence. The largest number of divorces occur in age group from 25 to 35 years. 35 percent regret taking this step. If previously the initiators of divorce were more often women, then disappointing changes have occurred here too. What to do if your husband leaves? Has he made his final decision, and is there any hope for his repentance? What steps should you take to save your family? If sympathetic friends or relatives “reassure” that “you can’t mend a broken vase” - don’t believe it! There are chances, and considerable ones! Very often this situation leads to the beginning of a new cycle in your family life, to a reassessment family values and qualitative changes in personalities. Quarrels and divorces, other acute and sudden situations arise under the influence of the energy of the planet Mars, which, fortunately, moves quickly, the malefic aspects disintegrate within a week (protracted situations can only be caused by the retrograde movement of Mars, which was observed recently and will repeat only after 2 years) . Therefore, it is important not to make any mistakes in the first days of divorce. No less important is how you will behave in such a situation, how you will show your feelings and emotions, and what actions you will take. Of course, this is a difficult test for nervous system any person, but you need to find the strength that will not allow you to give way to unnecessary emotions, because they can deal a decisive destructive blow. Here important rules that must be observed: Don't try to stop your husband and bring him back! Show your understanding of the situation and bitter regret, but nothing more. A woman who does not throw herself on her neck with the words: “Come back, my love, I will forgive everything,” of course, causes bewilderment in the eyes of a man, but does not lose her feeling self-esteem, and thereby evokes respect in him. Often a man has a question: “Aren’t you going to stop me?” On this note, it’s worth taking a breath and closing the door behind him. If you are really concerned about the question: then do not shower your husband with curses, do not reproach him for your broken heart and a ruined life! Better thank him for putting up with you and your obnoxious character all these years. Although the blame falls on both spouses, everything rested on your shoulders, which should have been much stronger and more reliable, and the nest you built should have become a reliable rear for both of you, and not a place where constant protracted battles are fought. Don't fill your heart with resentment! Ultimately, this will negatively affect your health. Some women, trying to take revenge, deprive their husbands of the opportunity to see their children. This is a grave mistake! After all, thereby he gets an unlimited amount of time to organize his personal life. Load it with children full program! Moreover, you have a compelling argument that you need to somehow get settled in life, and you simply need free time and opportunity. The feeling of guilt will not allow him to refuse such a small request. And which new girlfriend of his will like that he is busy with children? ex-wife all your free time? It is important that your shared apartment is clean all the time after he leaves. Make sure there are fresh flowers in the vase. He can come back at any time to pick up the item he left behind. Every man is an owner. Even a small bouquet of flowers can cause a pang of jealousy in him. The idea that other men are interested in his wife will make you think, and once again reevaluate your actions. Try to prepare his favorite dishes and place them in a visible place. Some psychologists and psychics believe that sometimes it is even worth leaving him alone in the apartment to give him the opportunity to look around and feel sad. Ask for help in everyday matters. But there is one important and effective tactical approach. Create a situation involving another man who failed to help you properly, and you are not satisfied with his actions. Explain that you are not ready to let another person into your life. For example, your friend helped move furniture in the apartment, but the situation did not satisfy you, but you did not dare to contact him again. Ask your ex-husband to return the closet to its original place. And tell me that this is much better. Especially if he was directly involved in the arrangement of the apartment. This could be an incorrectly screwed faucet in the bathroom or a breakdown in your car that the mechanic did not understand. It all depends on what area your husband is strong in. Praise him and tell him that it will be difficult to find a replacement for him. Slowly but surely he will come to the conclusion that he took the wrong step and made a hasty decision.

Hello, dear ladies! Today I want to raise a very painful topic – my husband’s departure. Unfortunately, a stamp in the passport and even the presence of children together is not a guarantee of a happy marriage “until death do us part.” And then it happened - my husband left for someone else. How to survive this tragedy, not go crazy and survive?

Naturally, for every woman, the news of a breakup is a real stress. How can it be that your loved one no longer wants to live with you and has even already found someone else! When you were doing countless household chores, cooking borscht, running parent meetings, mopped the floors, this bastard glanced to the left, and then, as if nothing had happened, returned to his home and marital bed!

At this time, the wife is literally torn from the mixture of the three most serious emotions - pain from deception, shame and fear of future loneliness. I want to howl, throw myself at the walls, scream, fight, bury myself in bed and not see anyone, or kill the traitor. The advice of girlfriends, friends, and relatives does not help, and their harsh proposals to forget about everything and move on are simply infuriating - apparently, they have never experienced anything like this. It’s just not clear how to live further... But believe me, it continues, and what it will be like depends only on you.

Time heals

Oddly enough, time really has a beneficial effect on the state of an abandoned woman; after about a week there is an opportunity to calmly reflect on her past life, analyze her and his mistakes, and think through further actions.

The psychologist's advice clearly recommends giving yourself free reign over your emotions during the first 40 days after a stunning conversation (if you're lucky, sometimes exes are limited to a short SMS message) in order to cry, throw out all the grievances and worries. After this, an emptiness forms in the soul, which can become the basis for a new, not necessarily worse life.

Reasons for the breakup

First of all, after separation, we ask the question “why did this happen?” Sometimes a man really has objective reasons for divorce, the most popular among them are:

1. Lack of intimacy. It is no secret that sex is of considerable importance for the stronger sex, and regular “headaches” can provoke a spouse’s desire to look to the other side.
2. Constant scandals. A person is looking for a more comfortable place, perhaps the husband fell in love with another because in her house he is calmer, more comfortable, no one finds fault or shouts over trifles. Of course, you don’t want to feel guilty, but you should reluctantly admit your shortcomings in order to avoid making these mistakes in the future.
3. Appearance. After a whirlwind romance, mutual love and admiration, feelings become dull, and we no longer strive to be the most desirable and beautiful for our spouse. Appear extra pounds, home clothes do not please with sexy lines, hairstyle and manicure at home are also forgotten. Indeed, often the husband’s departure is explained by his desire to be next to a more beautiful, well-groomed, bright girl.
4. The role of a henpecked man also belittles men; constant pointers and reproaches make you want to realize yourself in another field, why not try this in a new family?
5. Different spiritual levels. Often neither the man nor the woman is to blame for anything, time has just passed, they have changed, one has grown, and the other has remained at the same stage of development. And people become uncomfortable and uninteresting together.
6. Age. It's no secret that middle-aged men have their eyes on young girls and often replace their wives with them. This is, of course, very vile, because his wife was with him for so many years, helped him grow spiritually, realize himself, make a career, and now she is considered unnecessary thing and old stuff! But don’t rush to get upset and tear your hair out, because your new passion is no better than you, only younger, but this is not her merit. It is very likely that in just a couple of weeks the faithful will understand that it is not so good to live side by side with a young bird, she does not know how to cook, clean, take care of him, and all she needs is money. And soon your spouse will crawl to your doorstep, begging for forgiveness, and then only you will decide the fate of the family!

Is this the end?

It is important to determine whether the spouse's decision is final. After all, often dreams of a new married life far from reality. It’s one thing to spend a pleasant couple of hours with your beloved several times a week, but it’s a completely different thing to be with her all your free time, solve everyday problems, and get used to each other again. Often, after a couple of weeks, a man realizes his mistake and returns to the house, where everything is on its own shelves, the food is tastier, and the rooms are cleaner.

In addition, if the husband was previously frivolous, he can return to the family to continue enjoying a double life. Another thing is, do you want to continue living a lie?

Bring back your former happiness

Sometimes you need to fight for your family, especially if the spouse himself, in principle, is not against restoring the relationship. How to return a loved one who left the family?

1. Encourage your spouse to visit your children in your presence.
2. Invite him to dinners and tea parties together and “accidentally” cook his favorite dishes.
3. Ask him for help. For example, “my iron broke, I asked a friend, but nothing worked out for him, help me, because you just have golden hands.”
4. Leave his things in the most visible places.
5. Bloom like a woman, you don’t need drastic changes, but updating your hair, manicure, and losing a couple of extra kilos won’t hurt.

Straight to a new life

If living together is impossible, then decisive steps need to be taken to create a new future. What to do?

1. Ruthlessly throw away all the traitor's belongings; you can first use cognac as an anesthesia.
2. Stop communicating with your ex for a while, and then avoid accusations, shouting, unnecessary calls and conversations.
3. Communicate not only with friends, but also with men. Flirting increases self-esteem and gives a new incentive in life.
4. Take care of yourself. Think about how much time you previously spent on your unfaithful spouse; these hours can now be used for needlework, sports, hobbies, and other hobbies.

Of course, betrayal and the departure of her husband are a serious test for any woman, but having passed it, she becomes stronger, smarter, more experienced, having drawn conclusions for herself for the future. happy life. See you soon, please share interesting information with friends and subscribe to our blog, I wish you to withstand this difficult stage with honor and find new love!

For some reason, in our world, male infidelity is perceived as a normal phenomenon, they say, if a man has not cheated on his wife, then he is no longer a man. But, most likely, only representatives of the stronger half of humanity think so, and not women. Often the result male infidelity is his departure from the family. The husband left, and the woman is hurt and very lonely, because she was betrayed by the one she loves very much. Psychologists believe that leaving a man’s family is a very difficult period that must, first of all, be experienced, and then take any action.

How to survive the time when your husband left for someone else? Of course, the easiest way is to hate everything in the world and cry bitter tears, regretting that everything is already over. Women love very much, which is why they experience their husband’s departure to his mistress painfully and for a long time. But this is fundamentally wrong. The husband left, so let him go. And we, in turn, will learn to properly cope with the breakup and make plans for our future lives.

You are offended that your husband left for his mistress. Self-esteem is hurt and it seems that everyone around is to blame for what happened. Stop! Firstly, no one is to blame, and secondly, who told you that your husband left because you were bad. Stop all this speculation. You shouldn’t humiliate yourself in front of your husband by calling him on his cell phone and asking him to come back. Do you think this will work? No. The man decided, the man did. Stop breaking dishes in the house and covering all your sore spots with candy. The woman who managed to survive a divorce will tell you without hesitation that it is stupid to drive yourself into depression, because getting out of it is, oh, how difficult it is. An approximate scheme of your thoughts should be like this: he left, well, okay, think about it; I'm the best anyway; Everything in my life will be fine. It should take a couple of weeks before you can move on to the next step. Now you need to figure out what you are going to do next. You have two options: either you say goodbye to past life and start a new one, or try to return your husband to the family. But first, talk to yourself, decide whether you still have feelings for your husband, because if they don’t, then you shouldn’t look for reasons for reconciliation. And even children cannot be the decisive point in your relationship. You won't be nice by force. Besides, do you think it would be good for children to live in a family where mom and dad don’t love each other, but live purely out of parental responsibilities?

If your husband has left for someone else, and you want to get him back, remember the following: no need to put pressure on him or threaten him. All you can do is talk to your husband in a calm environment, weigh the good and the bad, and ultimately come to a common denominator. If your feelings flare up with renewed vigor, then you have a chance to start all over again. Don't worry if your husband doesn't want to come back. So, start organizing your own life. On a psychological level, you should see in yourself that woman who is always beautiful and desirable. The husband left, so what, the whole world does not revolve around his axis.

Change your appearance. For example, lose weight, change your hair color or haircut. If you wore clothes of gray and black colors, change them to bright colorful models: this will make your life brighter and more joyful. Get rid of all the things that remind you of ex-husband. There is no need to keep relics of the past in the house. Meet with your friends more often, discuss fashionable topics, and if you remember your husband, then as a person who simply once crossed your life. Don't avoid male attention, let it be strong half humanity compliments you, gives you gifts and takes you to restaurants. Perhaps among the men there will be one who will become your husband, with whom you will live a long and happy life. And if you meet someone somewhere, just say hello and show everyone that you are happy and welcome. Let him understand what a precious diamond he has lost.

At the beginning of the last century, economist, philosopher and thinker Karl Marx formulated and proved the well-known thesis: being determines consciousness...

Saturday, August 31, 2013

My husband left for someone else. Will he come back?

Almost all abandoned wives ask this question - the husband left for his mistress, will he return to the family, to his wife, to the children?

In this article, I have grouped some points that can be interpreted as a plus or minus in the question of whether the husband will return home from his mistress if he has gone to her, what is called “with things,” that is, as if forever.

How did he leave?

If he left as a result of a scandal, as they say, “slammed the door,” then this is a more favorable situation in terms of his return than when he packed his things in advance and left calmly and thoughtfully.

If you “packed your bags” for him and actually kicked him out of the house, then this is better than his calm departure, but worse than his impulsive departure with a scandal.

What did he do immediately after leaving?

If he immediately filed for divorce, then most likely his leaving was a deliberate decision, he prepared for this and is not going to return. But here I will make a reservation - very often it is not the husband who is prepared, but his mistress.

She thought of everything in advance for him and he now speaks to you in her words. She had ready-made solutions in case of a situation where he left you (maybe she also contributed to this) and now they came in handy.

Therefore, if after leaving home your husband speaks to you in a reasonable and balanced manner, this does not mean that he has thought through and decided everything. Perhaps, after some time of living together with his mistress, what he is claiming now will not seem to him at all such a correct and acceptable decision for him.

If after leaving your husband does nothing, but simply lives with his mistress, then this is a favorable sign for the possibility of his return. Does he communicate with you at least sometimes?
Any contact that he maintains with you, especially if it happens on his initiative, is a plus to the possibility of returning him.

Did you know that your husband has a mistress?

If you didn’t know anything, didn’t even guess, and he suddenly told you everything on his own initiative, then this is the worst option for returning your husband from his mistress.

If you didn’t know for sure, but suspected that he might have a mistress, then you need to evaluate: did you try to find out from him, did you start talking about it, or heroically remained silent, not showing that you suspected him.

If you tried to bring him to clean water, then how did you do it? Did you make a scandal or not? Did he make excuses or just cut off the conversation and remain silent? Or pretended to be innocently offended?

And the least favorable situation is when you knew nothing and knew “neither sleep nor spirit” and your husband’s departure was like a bolt from the blue for you! If the husband suddenly, unexpectedly for the wife, leaves for his mistress about whom until that moment the wife had no idea, this is a sure sign that the husband most likely will not return to her.

What are the departed husband’s plans for his future life?

Talk to him, ask unobtrusive questions about whether he loves this woman, what he plans to do with regard to your marriage, children... just without scandals, tears and reproaches, you will not achieve anything with this.

If at least one of these important issues he answers: “I don’t know, I haven’t decided yet, I haven’t thought about it yet,” which means his decision has not been thought through, having taken such a step as leaving home, he has no idea how he will live further. This means that his return to the family is quite possible, and the situation can be significantly influenced.

If he gives clear, thoughtful answers to all questions, then most likely he will never return to you. True, as I already said, perhaps these were not his answers, but his mistresses; she thought through everything and put her ideas about his future life into his head. But this is a completely different matter, such “suggestions” only work for a certain time, after which the departed husband may well speak in a completely different way. Unfortunately, there is usually no time to wait, nor is there any strength for this.

Do you and your husband have children together?

The presence of children, especially small children, is a factor that positively influences the possibility of a husband returning to the family. But this factor only works when a man loves his children. If they are indifferent to him, then any arguments in which children will be present, their fate, their interests, their future, will only irritate him.

Adult children already living independent life, usually cannot influence the situation in any way when the husband has left. A man will not listen to the advice of his children and will stop their attempts to interfere in his destiny. Therefore, asking your adult children for help is usually useless. Of course, you shouldn’t interfere with them if they themselves, on their own initiative, try to do something.

If the husband left for his constant mistress.

This is the worst option - a long-term love affair between your husband and the same woman. Such a constant mistress is a serious and formidable rival, she knows your husband well, knows how to get along with him, adapt to him, support him. She is ready and knows how to tolerate him Bad mood, outbursts of irritability, knows how to wait out unfavorable circumstances, restrain your emotions and not create scandals - you can do everything that you cannot do. Why am I so sure of this? Because if you knew how and did all this, then your husband would now be next to you, and not with her.

A permanent mistress who has waited until the moment when her dream of marrying her beloved begins to come true will not give you her husband just like that, without fighting for him.
On the other hand, your husband knows this woman well, he is used to her, he does not expect any unpleasant surprises in her character, habits, demeanor and the like. Therefore, there is no point in hoping that “he feels bad there,” “he’s unhappy with her,” “he’ll get bored and come back.” He knew perfectly well what he was getting into and what kind of life awaited him with his mistress. He has been living this life with her for a long time - don’t forget about it!

Keep in mind also that during the period when your husband left for her, but has not yet divorced you, or divorced, but has not yet married her, a constant mistress can be a real angel in the flesh! She will be what a man wants to see her. She will give him everything he wants and will even unravel those desires of his that he himself was unable to formulate for himself. She will provide him with the kind of sex that under normal circumstances she herself would be incapable of. The man, of course, will think that this will always be the case now, and this will strengthen his mistress’s position and weaken yours.

It happens that your constant mistress is also pregnant from your husband. It happens that she even gave birth to a child from him. It happens that she is rich or simply better off than you and showers your husband with gifts. It happens that she works with your husband or helps him in some way in his career or business - all these circumstances complicate the already difficult task of returning her husband.

If the husband left for his recent mistress.

If your husband left for his mistress whom he met only recently, then this makes your task easier. Usually this is a young, fresh, charming girl with a good figure. He is fascinated by her youth, sexuality, carefree character, and the ease of relationships with her.

But all this was so when he simply met with her, gave gifts, drank wine and made love to her. But as soon as he tries to live with her, everything can immediately change radically. Living together- this is not a country picnic with drinks and pleasant sexual arousal. You know this well! And for your husband’s young mistress, this is a whole revelation, a surprise that she didn’t even think existed.

Everyday small problems, inability to manage a household, inability to deal with an adult man, a difference in interests caused, again, by a difference in age, reluctance to deal with family daily life and hundreds of other things that are absent in love relationships, but are very visibly present in family ones. Your husband may see his beloved from a completely different, unexpected and very unpleasant side for him. In turn, young girls are by no means inclined to adapt to men much older than themselves; they, not without reason, believe that it is easier for them to change their lover than to change themselves for him.

In a situation where a husband leaves his wife for a young girl, very often the relationship with this girl falls apart on its own. And if this natural process is also helped a little... Therefore, if your husband chose you over his young mistress, this, of course, is insulting and emotionally hurts, but getting him back will be much easier than snatching him from the tenacious claws of an experienced, experienced woman who has been ex-wife for several years your husband's constant mistress.

*Of course, these are not all the points that need to be paid attention to and that are worth analyzing in order to draw a conclusion about whether your husband will return to you from his mistress or you can safely give up on him.
However, I hope the basic principle of analyzing the situation, how it should be viewed and assessed, has become clear... Moreover, no one in the world knows your husband as well as you know him.

Natasha returned home and literally felt something wrong with her skin. Then she discovered that all her husband Oleg’s things were missing from the house. She started calling him, but his mobile was turned off. Natasha realized that her husband had left her.

The husband left the family, and while she was not at home...

And then there were tears, a hundred thousand different “whys,” soul-searching and self-flagellation.

And similar stories happen in life with enviable regularity. We found out why this happens if the husband leaves for someone else - what to do in such situations and how to prevent them altogether.

Looking at the situation through a man's eyes

Our heroine, 34-year-old Natalya, lived with her husband for 10 years. And everything seemed to be going smoothly, but one day her husband left her.

"Ten years ago, when I met Natasha, I was sure that this was the woman of my life. Cheerful, sociable, a little crazy, but so cool. I remember those fun days how she could lift my spirits with just one look and inspire me to further achievements. She was a real “lighter”, she was interested in everything.

Natasha became not just a lover, but also best friend. Thanks to her, we had many friends, always in company. If I was tired, she always let me be alone. Or we just stayed silent together over a cup of tea. We didn’t have much money then, and we dreamed of a happy future. I noticed small changes in Natasha after we got married.

She began to behave somewhat more strictly. Then the baby came and she became a little more distant. She became grumpy. I remember this moment: during this period it began to seem to her that she had a bad figure. She staged such a performance several times: she invited men she knew to visit us and flirted with them in front of me.

Then she said that I give her little freedom, although she did not work, I fully provided for her. I became addicted to going to clubs with a friend. She said that she expected support and understanding from me. I talked a lot with men, arguing that I already have a social circle at work, and she is alone and bored.

But I had to wait two to three weeks for sex (my head hurt). But that was not so bad. Behind all these hysterics and performances, I still saw my old Natasha, only tortured and unsure of herself. And I hoped that everything would still be fine.

Then she stopped taking care of herself altogether and became very fat. At the same time, she still loved to assemble houses big companies. People came to us who were unpleasant to me. I told my wife about this, but the response was that I was impolite.

One day that very day came... I remember clearly: the sun was shining, the birds were singing. I understand. No, I even felt that I was leaving. This became the point of no return. I'm 39 years old, not that old. I hope to start a family."

Natasha: “I thought everything was fine with us. Although, I admit, I refused my husband bed when I was tired.” But the husband left for his mistress.

Work or family

28-year-old Larisa discovered that her husband had left after she returned from a long business trip. She could not even imagine that Vadim would ever leave her so simply, in English. After all, she always considered herself the girl of her dreams.

"I was sure that first I needed to make a career, and then start a family. I worked 14 hours a day in order to have a high income. When I met Vadim, a top manager at large company, then I increased my load. I wanted to match! I also worked on weekends. And in the end he left."

“Larissa is a workaholic maniac, and that says it all. She is a very good and interesting person, but for her work comes first, not relationships. I made a career just so that my life partner could not strain herself. Many times I suggested that Larisa change her job to a quieter one, but she didn’t seem to hear. In the end, I realized that I couldn’t see a woman who only lives in the office as my wife.”

Life for three

27-year-old Veronica discovered that her husband Pavel had left when she returned from a three-week holiday from the dacha where she and her mother had been.

“We always treated Pasha so well, cared for him, cherished him. Mom even left work to help us. But he didn’t appreciate anything at all.”

“My mother-in-law’s pancakes stuck in my throat. Veronica's mom made my life hell. Although we lived separately, I had the feeling that my mother-in-law lived with us! I tried to talk to my wife and ask her to moderate my mother’s ardor. But all this was useless. In the end I couldn’t stand it.”

Psychologist's opinion

These three situations have only one thing in common: people completely do not understand each other. Resentments accumulate in the soul of a representative of the stronger sex, sometimes for years and even decades.

Men are usually not hysterical and do not make a hasty decision to leave; most often they wait for the right moment. And to the lady, his decision seems unexpected and incredible, since, as a rule, she ceases to perceive the man as a partner to be reckoned with.

It is necessary to understand that any relationship is a dynamic system, that is, in constant movement and change. And these conditions of constant variability require both partners to be able to “keep their finger on the pulse.”

You've probably heard someone you know complain that they family life turns into a “swamp” Everything is smooth, ordinary, calm and familiar to the point of disgust. Most often this is a characteristic “calm before the storm”. And such illusory calm is worth fearing.

Not every man is able to withstand the emotional intensity that a woman can create during an argument about something. Therefore, what follows is a standard set of reactions: either “a fist on the table” or “a game of silence.” More often they choose the second. The man becomes silent and even agrees with your opinion, in words. After all, at this particular moment he is ready to do anything to end this dispute.

What's the result? As a result, she develops a false sense of victory, and he begins to accumulate the feeling of “she doesn’t hear me.” Who won here? As they say, no comments.

Having gained the upper hand in an emotional argument, a woman remembers a certain algorithm. (And, as a rule, this happens on an unconscious level.) If you want to be a winner, raise your voice very loudly, put pressure on consciousness or “make a tear,” appeal to the “masculine principle,” and so on. A standard set of simple manipulations.

And if communication between partners moves on these tracks, then you need to understand: the one who is silent in this situation is simply storing up his grievances, his disagreement and his strength. And if the accumulated emotions are not released in time, expect trouble.

It is very important to remember that each person has his own limit of patience. And when he reaches this edge, then conversations are already meaningless. IN family psychology There are such concepts: “threshold state” and “threshold state”, that same “point of no return”. And if a person’s approach to the threshold is a reversible state, then, unfortunately, there is no further possibility.

So, in essence, a man never leaves unexpectedly.

How to make sure that the man does not leave, so that the situation does not reach that very “point of no return”?

During meetings:

Learn to talk to each other. Listen and hear. Analyze your partner. If he behaves selfishly, then it is unlikely that it will be possible to have an intelligible dialogue with him in the future.

After the wedding:

Do not be afraid of domestic quarrels, but during them never get personal.

Do not flatter yourself if at first glance you managed to out-argue the man. Perhaps he fell silent because he realized that it was simply useless to talk to you.

Be softer and kinder, sometimes be the first to approach him and make peace (especially if you understand that you are wrong).

Create an atmosphere of comfort and tranquility at home, not nervousness and eternal war.

Absolutely not

CRITICIZE and insult your life partner, his family and friends.

BE SILENT AND SUCK for a long time.

CRY, fight in hysterics.

PLAYING like a bitch under the influence of fashion.

THREATEN him with suicide

DRAFT the child into the conflict.

TAKE REVENGE ON HIM, arrange provocations.

All this can backfire on you.

Misunderstanding of a wife or beloved provokes approximately 95% of cases when a man leaves without saying goodbye (this also includes situations when the husband leaves for another woman, because it is believed that if everything was normal in the family, then nothing like this would have happened).

But there are 5% of situations that are radically different from all common cases. We found out what else can motivate a man to silently leave his wife.

Terrible diagnosis

“This incident happened to my mother, but for me it also served as a very important lesson in life,” shared 25-year-old Oksana. “One day she returned from work and saw that her father’s things were gone. He left. Mom cried for two weeks and could not understand what happened.

Only then did their mutual friend reveal the secret. It turned out that dad was diagnosed with a very serious disease of the nervous system, which was supposed to turn him into a bedridden invalid. Father didn’t want us to see him like this, he didn’t want to be a burden to us. But my mother found my father in the hospital, sat with him day and night and did a lot for his recovery.”

“When the doctor told me that I was infertile, my life ended,” says 35-year-old Peter. - But I knew perfectly well that my wife dreams of a child. So he left and didn’t say anything. I know she loved me and would have stayed with me, but I didn’t want to ruin her life.”

Intergender orientation

“I never thought that this would happen to me,” said 29-year-old Konstantin. - At first I had everything like everyone else: a wife and daughter. But at the same time there is a feeling that something is missing. And then one guy came to work in our office. After a stormy corporate party, we ended up at his house, I drank a lot and don’t remember exactly how it all happened.

So, we ended up in bed. I have never had such pleasure. The next day, he packed his things and left silently, moving to live with his colleague. I didn’t want to tell my family, even at this cost.”

Psychologist's opinion

Sometimes the reasons are so non-standard that a man simply does not want to injure his beloved. He analyzes the situation and comes to the conclusion that the pain of his loss, his silent breakup, is a lesser evil than the shocking truth. That is, he does not want to offend the woman, but, on the contrary, seems to protect her.

When faced with the departure of a man, you should not immediately blame him for all the bad things. Try talking to his friends or relatives, perhaps they will clarify the situation. After learning the truth, try to understand your loved one.

Video materials on the topic of the article

7 tips on how to behave in this situation:

How to return your husband to your family:

The reasons for husbands leaving the family are analyzed in this video:

Psychologist Natalya Tolstaya advises: