An adult man and a little girl: psychological types of an ideal couple. An adult man and a young girl: madness or an ordinary couple? Relationship between an adult man and a girl
No one will be surprised by a marriage in which the husband is 10, 15 or 20 years older than his wife. Psychologists have identified several reasons explaining why girls prefer older mature men rather than their peers. Relationship experts point to the stability of such relationships, confidence in the strength of their partner’s feelings, as well as their wisdom and life experience. The main motive of most girls is material wealth.
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The benefits of dating a mature man
Many young girls want older men, which explains their reluctance to have an affair with their peers. Representatives of the fair sex are driven by different motives that guide them when choosing a life partner. Psychologists highlight a number of advantages of such relationships:
- An adult man is confident in his future, he has a strong position in society, and he has property. This allows him to start a family and provide his loved ones with a decent life. A girl will not have to wait several years to earn money for her own apartment or car; her beloved will provide her with these benefits. Every woman strives for a good life, so in no case should this be considered a sign of commercialism.
- A person's status plays an important role. A woman is flattered by communication with a man who enjoys the respect of others and occupies a high position in society. Next to him, she feels more confident, she has a desire to live up to his status.
- Girls choose older guys because they are smart and have life experience. There is always something to talk about with them, so they are excellent conversationalists. Typically, mature men have had relationships in the past from which they have learned valuable experiences. Therefore, they will not reproach their beloved for the slightest reason and will always listen to her patiently.
- It is important for a girl to have a person next to her who firmly knows what she wants to achieve in life. Frivolous guys are not capable of long-term relationships, so communication with them rarely leads to the legalization of relationships and the creation of a family.
- Financial situation is an important factor in a relationship. There are girls who are used to enjoying today and getting the most out of life. A wealthy man can afford to give his beloved an expensive gift, go with her on a trip abroad and help her organize her own business.
- Girls love older men because they admire their beauty. Therefore, there is no reason to doubt the fidelity of your loved one. He will never start an affair on the side, because a young attractive girl is waiting for him at home.
- Mature men are excellent lovers. They try to keep themselves in good physical shape and know how to please a woman in bed.
Love between a man and a woman is an important component of a happy and harmonious relationship. But, as you know, every coin has two sides. Psychologists note that no matter how great the power of love, communication between a girl and a mature man has its own nuances, knowledge of which will help preserve the union.
Relationships are hard work. This is especially true for unions of people with a large age difference.
The main thing that a girl should realize is that it is almost impossible to change her loved one. If a young man easily adapts to the interests of a girl and her desires, then the personality of an adult has already been formed. Therefore, we must accept him as he is.
A mature man may have children from a previous relationship. The girl will have to get used to the fact that her lover spends a lot of time with his children and puts their needs and interests above all else.
Young girls often fall in love with much older men. This happens for several reasons. Firstly, girls mature physiologically and psychologically faster, so at some point in time, peers seem uninteresting and immature to them. Secondly, adult men can boast of a wealth of life experience, thanks to which they know how to charm the fairer sex. And thirdly, mature men take life more seriously, they can surround their chosen ones with care and give them a comfortable life. It seems that in couples where the partners are separated by an impressive age difference, love and harmony reign. However, not everything is so rosy; relationships with a man older than a woman are fraught with some difficulties.
If you are planning to connect your life with a man who is practically old enough to be your father, you should carefully consider all the pros and cons. At the very least, you need to prepare for 7 common difficulties that await you if you are in a relationship with an older man.
Difficulties in relationships with an older man
1. Conflict of generations
Most often, relationships between a young girl and an adult man develop according to a child-parent scenario. This has its advantages, because your partner will take on all the pressing problems and concerns. But at the same time, at some point you will again feel like a teenager who is fiercely defending his rights to his dad and mom. A difference of ten or several decades in a man’s eyes automatically makes you weaker and more foolish. In addition, your personalities were formed in different eras, which is why it will be difficult for you to come to a common opinion in some areas of your life.
2. He is not ready to compromise
Maturity automatically implies a formed personality. An adult man is endowed with wisdom and experience, which makes relationships with him more comfortable, stable and calm. Most mature representatives of the stronger sex have established ideas about life that seem to them to be the only true ones. But if it suddenly turns out that your principles or habits do not coincide with his opinion, you will have to make a compromise. A difference of views can lie in wait for you in absolutely all areas of life, from everyday obligations to your freedom. Here one can object by noting that absolute agreement does not exist even in pairs between peers. This is true, but the difference is that young guys tend to make concessions more easily.
3. Excessive jealousy
If you connect your life with an adult man, you will give him a priceless gift. When dating young girls, older men again feel young, happy and self-confident. Of course, he will be deathly afraid of losing you. At the same time, a man who is in such a relationship, deep down in his soul, understands that at one not wonderful moment for him, his chosen one may leave for another. This storm of emotions gives rise to a lot of fears and worries in his soul, which very often transform into unhealthy jealousy.
4. Ex-wife and children from a previous marriage
Most likely, your chosen one has a marriage and children from another woman. This means that you will never occupy the main place in his life. In addition, you may have to establish contact with his adult children, which often becomes an impossible task. It is possible that your partner’s children will accuse you of mercantile purposes, believing that you linked your life with their father for the sake of a future inheritance.
5. Mismatch of temperaments
Modern medicine has made a huge breakthrough, however, it is powerless against nature. No matter how carefully a man takes care of his health and appearance, he will age faster than you. First of all, this will manifest itself in a mismatch of temperaments, which will have a negative impact on your intimate life. If this does not scare you, and you are ready to control your desire for the sake of love, or you have a very passionate partner, think about the fact that one day you will want to become a mother. It may turn out that the potential father of your child no longer wants or cannot torture himself with such a responsible role.
6. You don't have mutual friends.
Perhaps the age difference is not an obstacle to friendship, however, your chosen one is unlikely to feel comfortable in your company, just as you are in his. A large age difference creates a discrepancy between interests and needs. Be prepared for the fact that when you and your friends want to go to a nightclub or hike, your partner will prefer to relax in the form of fishing or reading a book.
7. Your parents are unlikely to approve of your choice.
Couples with a significant age difference have not shocked society for a long time. However, the tolerant attitude towards this issue often ends the moment it comes to our loved ones. There is a high probability that your parents will not accept your choice, which will result in painful conflicts, quarrels and resentments.
It may seem that the listed difficulties are an insurmountable barrier to happiness. In fact, age is not always an obstacle to love. History knows a lot of cases when the union between a young girl and an adult man was filled with joy and harmony. Just be prepared for the fact that in such relationships, just like in relationships with peers, crises and conflicts may arise.
The relationship between a young girl and an adult man did not cause any complaints, probably only in those days when the groom was chosen by the bride’s parents. But now a couple with a serious age difference will definitely cause rumors, gossip and censure from the public. But conversations are conversations, and couples “an adult man and a young girl” are not so uncommon, and for many such relationships develop into a happy family life. So there is no need to run away from your feelings, relying on public opinion, it is better to understand how to please an adult man, who knows, maybe he is exactly the one you need?
How to please an older man?
What to do if you fall in love with an adult man? Naturally, do not sit idly by, but try to attract his attention. How to do this and how to seduce an adult man, read below.
Of course, these are only approximate lines of behavior that you need to follow when charming an older man. After all, they are all different and they like different things, but if you take a closer look, you will definitely understand how you can hook the one you are interested in. By the way, where does such interest in adult men come from? Are there not enough peers?
Why do girls like older men?
The love of an adult man for a young girl and similar feelings of girls for an older man cannot be explained for one simple reason - love, in principle, is an inexplicable feeling. But you can say why young girls become interested in mature men.
How can a woman please a man so that he completely loses his mind and thinks only about you? To do this, it is enough to be a real woman and know some little tricks.
Probably every woman has had this situation: she is madly in love with a man, but for some reason he does not pay attention to her. This, of course, begins to frustrate, stress and even irritate us. As a result, we spend sad evenings, suffering for the most wonderful guy in the world. It's time to stop this! You need to fight for happiness, and if you, by all means, want to start a relationship with this particular man, start taking active action.
Even for the most desperate feminist, it is important to be aware of the fact that guys like her. It always improves your mood and self-esteem. We always like to get what we want, no matter if it's a handbag or a married man. Anyone can be conquered and conquered.
Any representative of the fairer sex should have knowledge of how to win the heart of both a young man and an older one. Knowing minimal information about the art of conquering the male body and mind, you will have strong trump cards in your hands. Thanks to which you can not only improve your personal and intimate life, but also achieve the desired career heights.
Remember that, having conquered a man, you may encounter a number of nuances. For example, for you it was just fun, but he fell in love with you. Therefore, while playing, do not forget to think about what awaits you after this.
How to attract attention?
1. Objectively evaluate the guy and yourself. This is a very important stage. The manner of your behavior will depend on how much you understand it. For example: if the guy is active, interested in modern gadgets, you shouldn’t play a pretentious lady in front of him, it’s unlikely to work. But, at the same time, a calm homebody will not like an avid nightclub goer. Having an idea of what exactly might interest a man, choose the most appropriate behavior.
2. Miniskirt and stiletto heels. The male sex loves with their eyes, all of them, without exception, adore girls in beautiful and revealing outfits. They are especially delighted if a woman is wearing a short skirt, but does not look like a call girl. A dress that emphasizes your figure is the best choice if you want to get someone's attention.
3. Learn to talk to him. Beautiful appearance is not enough; men are not interested in communicating with a girl who cannot put together two words. Be interested in the life of the man you like, ask questions. Just don't turn the conversation into an interrogation. Let the man know that you are interested in him.
4. Find what unites you. It could be a love of football, theater or horse riding. This is a great reason for long conversations. Guys are delighted when girls share their hobbies.
5. Be successful and self-sufficient. To please a man, you need to show that you are an individual, know your worth and can stand up for yourself!
6. Be different. Even if you like a man very much, you shouldn’t look at him with devoted eyes every time. At first it will flatter him, and then it will begin to stress him. Be friendly to him today, and tomorrow modestly say hello and pass by. This will make him pay attention to you.
7. A sea of positivity. It’s impossible not to talk to a cheerful, kind girl. So think about whether a guy can like you if you constantly walk around with a sour face and blame everyone around you for your troubles. Of course not. Any man will want to run away from you as soon as possible. So learn to be positive.
8. Don't disappear from his field of vision for a long time. You shouldn’t constantly loom in front of him either, but you can “accidentally” bump into him in the corridor at least a couple of times a day. Don't give a man the opportunity to forget about you. And regular meetings will help a man get used to you.
9. Don’t throw hysterics and scandals in front of him. A man may not intentionally witness your nervous breakdown; after that, he is unlikely to want to have anything to do with you.
10. Make friends with his friends. For men, the opinion of his friends and acquaintances is of great importance. So try to get them to speak well of you.
11. The best way to show a man that you like him is to flirt. Do it beautifully, don’t turn into a vulgar person, and the man will be at your feet.
12. Try to meet a man in an informal setting. It is not always possible to hint to a work colleague about your feelings in the office (after all, other employees can be distracting). But a corporate party or business trip gives you more chances. Take advantage of the situation.
Now you know how to conquer a man so that he wants to date you. Just be honest with yourself. Even if you have been seeking a man’s attention for a very long time, but after getting to know him better, you realize that he is not suitable for you – back off. Only the most worthy should be next to you!
What to do if you like a man
Many girls don't know what to do if they like a man. Should you take the initiative into your own hands or wait for the first step, only giving signs? There is no single strategy for amorous affairs, and in each specific case you need to act in a new way. However, women and girls must understand: men have the same doubts, are just as afraid of being rejected and fall in love without looking back just as women do. It's just harder to understand.
What to do if you like a guy?
First, you need to give him a sign that you care about him. Perhaps he has also liked you for a long time, but he simply does not dare to take the first step. Most men are afraid of being rejected, and this fear in them is much stronger than that of women. A rude refusal and wounded male pride greatly affects self-esteem, so some guys prefer to act for sure, being confident in reciprocity.
What kind of sign could this be? There are several ways to give a hint:
However, all these are techniques from the world of Hollywood romantic films. In life, everything turns out a little differently, and your innocent flirtations may seem funny. So practice in front of a mirror or with friends. Does it look funny and awkward? Great, now you have relaxed and started laughing. Keep that feeling of casualness and fun, and when it comes time to signal to the one, you'll look more natural, and then just walk up and introduce yourself. It doesn’t matter at all whether your attempt will be mutual and whether the acquaintance will develop into something more. The main thing is that you tried.
Sometimes you need to let a colleague or a man you already know know that you like him. Signs of interest work very well here. Ask a man about his work, hobbies, interests. Show that you care and have common topics to talk about. Give praise or admit that you like the same things. At least you'll make a new friend.
What to do if you like a guy, but the feeling is not mutual?
In this case, there are two strategies for action. The first is to make him fall in love with you. Get to know him better: who he lives with, what he loves, what he is interested in. It would be ideal if you manage to find out his past amorous history. What happened to his ex? Did she cheat and leave or did their relationship slowly fizzle out? You need to learn from the mistakes of others so as not to repeat them yourself.
Try to become indispensable to the guy - a friend, colleague, assistant or neighbor. Men are sometimes very helpless and need approval and support. And if you get a self-sufficient conquering hero, then the “damsel in distress” strategy will help. Let your man know that you won’t be able to take a single step without him, and you need his support, advice and care like air. Over time, he will feel the need for you as a person who needs his strong shoulder.
If a man simply does not want to notice your signs of attention, well, find a new object to seduce.
If you like a guy, let him go
Not all men like women who chase them. In each of them there is a deeply hidden hero-conqueror who himself wants to conquer the lady. In this case, the best strategy would be to retreat. Stop paying attention to him, work on yourself, become better than the women around you. Such a facility will be completed during the conquest. A proud, inaccessible, independent woman inflames the fantasy much more than a young lady who is ready and accommodating for anything. Become such a lioness, and the one you were ready to run after yesterday will start running after you. It may even turn out that you will not get the man you liked at first, but a much better and more attractive specimen.
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15 signs that a man likes a woman. If a man wants a woman: signs
Every woman wants to be loved and adored. When a man looks at his chosen one with delight, it is worth a lot. For personal life to develop harmoniously, both partners must be sexually satisfied. But at the beginning of a relationship, a woman does not always understand what a man wants from her. To understand, it is enough to carefully observe the young man and correctly evaluate his actions and words. If a man wants a woman, the signs will be quite eloquent.
How to recognize sympathy?
Psychologists have identified a number of factors that may indicate that a man has more than just friendly feelings for a woman.
- Close contact. When a young man tries to get closer to his chosen one and reduce the distance, this is a clear sign. He can lean towards the girl or sit closer to her, thus showing sympathy.
- Soft tone. The gentle notes that slip into a man’s speech indicate that he likes his interlocutor. If a guy shares secrets and talks about plans for his life, it means he is ready to open up. Men rarely show affection towards people they don't like. When a man wants a woman, the signs will definitely be present. If representatives of the stronger sex begin to “coo”, then they definitely like the woman.
- Relaxed pose. As a rule, guys, in order to attract attention, change their behavior and flaunt all their masculinity. But when they communicate with a girl who is pleasant to them, they relax and subconsciously try to soften their natural aggressiveness. If a man trusts his chosen one, he feels at ease and calm in her company.
- Sight. It’s not for nothing that they say that the eyes “mirror” the soul. They can tell about a man’s attitude towards a woman much more than words. When a young man looks directly and openly and does not let his chosen one out of sight, then he definitely likes her. If a man really wants a woman, his gaze will constantly move to her lips and neckline.
- Blurred look. When a guy is intoxicated by a girl, he loses control of his own gaze. His pupils begin to dilate, and he looks directly at the desired object, without looking away.
- Gestures. If a man wants a woman, he starts sticking his thumbs into the belt holes in his pants. His hands cannot find rest, he wants to touch his chosen one. Therefore, sometimes he keeps his fingers clasped together.
- Sexy timbre. When a man is excited, his voice becomes deep and low. This is due to the fact that hormones affect the position of the ligaments. By the way, this also applies to women.
- Pauses in conversation. When a man wants a woman, signs may be that when communicating with a woman, he will pause after meaningful phrases during a conversation. If the conversation takes on sexual overtones, this is also evidence of desire.
- Facial expressions and artificial restraint. Sometimes a man, outwardly cold, when communicating with a girl, begins to bite his lip, shake his head a little in response to her remarks and remain silent more than usual - this means that he has “matured”. A slight trembling of the hands, a hoarse voice and reddening of the skin can also be considered as a manifestation that the young man desires intimacy.
- Timid jealousy. Naturally, at the beginning of an acquaintance, a man is unlikely to make scandals and show his jealousy, but some factors may indicate that he considers his interlocutor to be his woman. You need to carefully observe how he reacts to the communication and compliments of other men that they give to his passions. The young person may be a little nervous or irritable.
- I grew up without a dad. He left us when I was little;
- I grew up with my dad, but he was always busy (working, traveling, ...)
- Married ladies agree with me that if you leave all the work to a man, you are unlikely to get married.
- Unmarried people shout loudly that under no circumstances should you do anything yourself, otherwise the representatives of the stronger sex will be “uninterested” and they will not “appreciate” her.
- All the guys who came on a date with a suddenly “fat” (compared to her photo on the site) girl almost immediately asked a question about her weight and left.
- The girls, who discovered a plumper guy, allowed him to kiss them on the cheek and hug them when they met and said goodbye, and spent the entire date with him, that is, they treated him much more gently.
- Until now, your admirer has not been himself. Therefore, the guy you fell in love with is not at all who he really is.
- He never questioned whether you were right for him in the long run. Everything that had happened up to this point had happened purely on the basis of his physical attraction.
Does a man want a woman?
This question interests every girl at the beginning of a relationship. Of course, the most reliable evidence is the erection that occurs, but it is not always possible to notice it. Therefore, it is worth looking for other ways that will help determine a guy’s desire. If a man wants a woman, signs such as tone of voice or gestures will definitely give him away.
How can you tell if a guy is excited?
Experts advise paying attention to a number of factors that indicate that a man is excited.
If a man wants a woman, the signs cannot be hidden. Every young man tries to show his individuality in order to conquer a girl, but there are still common features. In the presence of his chosen one, a man can adjust his tie or belt and touch his face.
When he holds his hands on his belt or on his hips, this is self-confidence and a subconscious call for sex. A man wants a woman to caress these places.
All thoughts are about only one thing...
If a man wants a woman, the signs will “scream” about it. A young man can persistently call a girl home for some completely stupid reasons: to watch a movie, evaluate his renovation, or help him with the design of his apartment.
When a man thinks about sex, he can say vulgar phrases, which sometimes even repel girls. But it’s worth coming to terms with this, since at the moment he is completely focused on his feelings and the desire to possess his chosen one.
Material side
Many girls often think about what are the signs that a man wants a woman. Signs may also relate to the material aspect. When dining in a cafe, a young man will definitely pay for his passion, and will not offer her to split the bill equally. This does not mean that the woman is obliged to spend the night with him, but the man hopes that she will appreciate his generosity.
Some secrets of male psychology
It has long been known that representatives of the stronger and weaker sex differ in nature. Therefore, women should not expect from men what they cannot give them. In order for relationships to develop harmoniously, girls must take into account some of the characteristics of men.
Young people do not know how to vigorously show delight and admiration; they prefer to hide their emotions. Even a small compliment can be regarded as the highest praise. A woman is unlikely to hear words in superlative form.
Almost all men love to interrupt. They do this not on purpose and do not want to offend or belittle their interlocutor. This manner of communication occurs on a subconscious level. A man's brain is designed in such a way that he looks for a solution. Therefore, while the girl is explaining the essence of the question, he can already think through the answer and skip information that, in his opinion, is unnecessary.
When talking with a man, you must first state the main idea, and only then move on to discussing the details.
Young people love to argue, but a woman should not perceive this as a quarrel or disagreement. There is no need to prove anything to a man if the issue is not fundamental. It is much wiser to agree with him and admit the correctness of his arguments.
When a tense situation arises, it is enough for a woman to touch a man and hug him to calm the quarrel. This behavior turns off logic and tunes him to emotions.
The most valuable thing is actions!
The behavior of a man who wants a woman is quite predictable. He will look for meetings with her, call after dates, give flowers and gifts. You should not agree to an intimate relationship without making sure that the young man has serious intentions. If his feelings are sincere, he will definitely prove it with his actions and actions. And when a man needs one-time sex, he is unlikely to court for a long time and seek the attention of his passion. Women should remember this so as not to experience a bitter feeling of disappointment later.
Love for an older man
A grown man... He attracts you to himself like a magnet. He is smart, interesting, it is always interesting and fun to be with him, and if not fun, then at least it’s just interesting to spend time. With him, all complexes and embarrassments disappear, as if by magic - it’s easy to communicate with him. He will always find the right word to encourage and support if you are sad or lonely. A look, a word, a touch and you want to open up like a flower. Fragrance, bloom, smell and delight others with your presence...
Grown man can give more than your peer, there’s not even anything to argue about - he has a wealth of experience behind him, which he can skillfully and dexterously apply in any situation. A man who has seen life feels confident and knows how to achieve his goal. Girls are very attracted to these qualities. Why? Yes, because every girl wants to see a strong, courageous and confident man nearby in order to feel under the protection of her loved one.
By the age of 30-40, a man, even if he is free, has a marriage or relationship with women (or maybe both), and this means that he must understand women - their thinking and psychology. From this we can conclude that he can read your thoughts and, using this, present completely unexpected and pleasant surprises, be the very person who will listen, advise, and behave in such a way that you will remain completely delighted with his behavior . Not like young people who only demand, but have not yet learned to love properly.
Why am I attracted to an older man?
We can talk about this for hours, but the most important thing is that many girls sooner or later wonder: “ Why am I attracted to older men? Why am I bored and uncomfortable with my peers?" I will now immediately clarify that this does not happen to every girl, but only to a certain group of girls. Now I’ll tell you more.
When I consulted on a forum for girls, girls often approached me with the following question: “ I fell in love with an adult man. What should I do?“And I told the girls not only what to do, but also why it happens that instead of being attracted to a young guy, a girl suddenly, unexpectedly, as if by the wave of a wand, falls in love with a man who is twice or even three times her age.
The first question I ask a girl is something like this: “How are things going with your dad? Do you feel a lack of attention from dad?” These are the questions that answer the question: Why am I attracted to older men?
If a girl grew up without a father, then VERY often at the moment of puberty, due to the lack of timely attention, care, love and affection, this attraction occurs. This cannot be avoided - the need to belong must be satisfied! The body requires this. What is the need to belong? In other words – is this a necessity?? A dad is the first man in a girl’s life, and therefore we are looking for a companion either like a father or his complete opposite.
Well, here are the most common answers that I usually get from girls who fall in love with an adult man:
The answers clearly show a lack of attention on the part of the father. And it must be - first of all, so that the body develops correctly and does not experience a lack of something, i.e. was completely healthy.
The need must be satisfied! Otherwise, the search for older people will continue.
The first thing we can advise is to find your dad and resume communication. If dad, for example, cannot be around (God forbid, of course, but he died), then a stepfather is suitable for this role. Try to get closer to him spiritually at the level of understanding, sympathy, support, advice. Imagine that he is your real father. But you need to do this sincerely, because the more believable everything happens, the faster you will be able to feel: “whew, I feel better, I want a young one!”
The body must get what it is missing, replenish its resources in order to “stop getting sick.”
At least one understanding of why this happens (why she is attracted to an adult man) is sometimes enough for a girl to understand in which direction she needs to work.
The truth about how men fall in love
After my article about the “hunter-prey” myth, it became clear to me from the girls’ reactions that most simply do not know the truth about how men fall in love.
Interestingly, comments from women who are already married are strikingly different from messages from girls who just can’t find a husband.
My dears, a man’s feeling that his girlfriend is the best in the world and he never wants to lose her does not at all come from the torment that he had to endure in order to “win” her. This feeling comes from lightness and joy when he is next to her. Hard work is associated with the concept of “a weight off my shoulders,” and not at all with the joyful realization of “I’m terribly lucky.” A man falls in love because he enjoys being with you, not hard.
In addition, by bullying a fan during the courtship stage, you give him the moral right to mock you when he “conquers” you. Any action gives rise to reaction.
How do men fall in love?
Men and women fall in love in different ways and at different speeds. By following the “hunter” pattern, you, on the contrary, reduce your chances of attracting a partner for a long time. Only by ceasing to be a “prey” do you have a chance at a serious relationship. To do this, you need to understand how men fall in love.
Stage 1: I like you
For men, it all starts with physical attractiveness. If a woman can still fall in love with a guy she is not physically attracted to because she “respects” him, it is completely impossible for a man.
Recently, an experiment was conducted in America: a nice guy and a girl put excellent photos on a dating site, but on a date they went on a date wearing special makeup and a suit that made it seem like they were seriously overweight.
After a divorce, many Western women who have gained weight begin to exercise and lose weight, after which they quickly find a new partner. For ladies, this is elementary: if you are slim and don’t “punch men’s brains,” you can easily find a partner.
So remember: men are initially attracted to your physical body. If you think that a guy approached you because he likes your character, you are cruelly deceiving yourself.
What exactly a man likes about your appearance may vary. There are those who adore large or, conversely, small breasts, thin ankles, long fingers or long straight (or curly) hair. Some people like steep hips, while others like narrow hips. Every man has his own “type” that he likes. Many will not even be able to say what exactly attracts them, but this feature still exists.
A man sees his “type” in a woman and begins to feel that “he likes her.” But so far this guy hasn't fallen in love at all.
Stage 2: Exploration
Most men are constantly attracted to several women, they “like” several girls. So they do some “scouting” to see who will reciprocate his initial advances. That is, at any time, they are trying to conduct reconnaissance regarding several women. Only seeing reciprocal interest does the guy begin to concentrate his efforts on one girl.
These advances are very minimal, it's not even flirting or courtship. A man just needs to understand that if he starts courting you, something might happen. At this stage, even if he likes the girl, he still doesn’t care whether she rejects him or accepts his advances. If she rejects him, he will have no problem courting someone else. Naturally, there are exceptions (worried people who go crazy), but most normal men feel this way.
Stage 3. Stalking
This is what you girls love so much, right? The man is “running” after you.
If a woman gives a guy even the weakest positive signal in response to his advances (someone needs a stronger signal), he will begin to pursue. Sometimes a man may even imagine a positive answer.
A guy who thinks that a girl likes him begins to act, trying to attract her attention. At this stage, the man is trying to make you notice him and understand that he likes you. Some women already fall in love by this point, seeing the attention of a man. If you give him a positive response (for example, agreeing to a date or replying to a message), the transition to the next stage will occur.
Stage 4: Making an impression
At this stage, many women are already beginning to fall in love, but the man has not even thought about his feelings. For now, he just wants to impress you, trying to show that he is a worthwhile partner. A man plans dates, gives you gifts, and generally tries to make you happy. If you haven’t “given up” yet, you will usually do so at this stage.
Stage 5: Winning Your Love
After all his investment, a man wants you to love him now. Getting your love is an achievement for him. Instead of falling in love with you, he only cares about whether he succeeded in making you fall in love with him. A man may even demonstrate his ability to commit to a serious relationship so you can see that he has the potential to be a great long-term partner. You're probably seriously in love already, but he's not yet.
If a man gets to this stage, which doesn't always happen, it means you've already made your feelings towards him clear and he knows you love him and want a serious relationship. What you don't know is that for your "hunter", this was all just a pregame to get proof for himself that he is the man you are looking for.
In addition, there are small problems:
It is at this point in the relationship that the man who “conquered” you begins to wonder whether he needs this relationship at all. He begins to look at your human qualities and what, in general, you are able to offer in this department.
Your lover begins to ask himself:
- Do I love her?
- Do I want to be with her?
- Will I be happy with her?
- Is this the kind of woman I really want?
What's interesting is that if you believe in the myth of the hunter, then most likely you haven't been yourself all this time either! You also pretended diligently. Therefore, it is quite possible that you behaved in such a way that your partner would not answer yes to all of these questions.
It is at this stage that a young man may decide to end the relationship “for no reason at all” or for a reason that seems fictitious to you (quite possibly, it is). Men who easily follow their impulse to “conquer” are easily ready to abandon a woman at this stage, unless she is his ideal in everything. Why not? He knows that he is capable of conquering a woman.
If a man, after analyzing your relationship and his feelings, makes a positive decision, he is ready to fall in love with you and surrender to his feelings. The next 2-3 months will be wonderful and wonderful. You will notice that your partner cares about you and truly loves you. That's it, your man has fallen in love.
Representatives of the stronger sex are more rational than us women. They really need to think about their feelings before giving in to them.
To prevent you, as a woman, from falling into the trap of a conquering man, the only way is to reverse this pattern. This will mix up all his usual mechanisms, and he will have to build a relationship with you without all these proven tricks in stock.
The ability to connect with him on a “human” level, before you yourself fall in love and lose time, immediately brings your relationship to the penultimate stage for male love, and forces him to decide whether he wants to be with you in principle. But this connection is not possible if you are playing games. This is only possible if you know how to get to his “human” level and are not afraid to show your true “essence”.
Also be sure to read:
What to do if you start liking another man?
What should I do if I start liking another man and I’m married?
This is probably temporary insanity. Perhaps you are sick of everyday life and monotony. And the husband no longer tries to look and behave the way he did before marriage. You wanted variety, some new sensations, bright emotions. And if you love your husband and want to save your family, then you need to overcome this insanity. Remember how it all started with your husband, your dates, happy moments. You've been through so much together. And the other man may only be good now. You don't know him. Maybe, having achieved his goal, he will become even more of an asshole.
It’s better to have your own, dear)
In fact, I think this: if a married woman likes another man, it means that she is not satisfied with something in her family life, and she subconsciously demands changes. I already spoke on the “Big Question” website about an incident that happened in my life, I’ll tell you again, although it’s a little awkward. While I was married, I simply fell in love with another man, my husband and I celebrated some holiday, and my husband noticed it. Well, burning eyes, a peculiar look and all that. Here, in my opinion, you don’t need to be a psychic. We returned home and the next day my husband performed a real masterpiece. He began to change himself! In general, for starters, he made a beard like that man, but that was just the beginning. And the point is not the beard, but the fact that he realized that if he didn’t do something, he would have to continue to be jealous. Life together is about daily actions and efforts. You need to go through all the stages and tests and not lose your love. Sometimes you need to change your habits, principles, attitude towards certain things. When this is lacking in her own husband, a woman begins to like another man, in whom she finds certain aspects. Therefore, we need to consider not a triangle, but family relationships where there are only two people.
Try to understand what you lack in your relationship with your husband, what you need. A holy place is never empty - in order for new sympathies to arise, there must be a “place” for them in the soul. And if it exists, then why? What's missing? Romantics? Attention? Acuity of sensations? Only by answering this question can you understand what and how to fill this “gap”, and whether it is possible to get what you need from your own spouse in an already established relationship. And then make decisions about what to do.
23 Sep 2016
About fifty percent of people have had sex with a significantly older partner. If we take statistics only among women, this percentage will be even higher. And the point here is not only the blindness of love, to which all ages are submissive. Living together with a large age difference gives both partners a lot: the older one receives youthful energy, and the younger one gets experience.
Love will come unexpectedly
Why do grown men love young girls? Often the last chance effect works here - he loves like the last time, without sparing himself. And sometimes everything comes together: knowledge, past mistakes and failures are now taken into account and passed - he knows exactly how to do it. Such a man is both wise and young at heart at the same time. He already knows that giving is much more pleasant than receiving - and lives in accordance with this. It’s easy to be capricious with him - and he won’t tolerate quirks through his teeth, but understand them and accept them, even getting a kick out of them...
He clearly distinguishes the main from the secondary. His beloved, his gentle younger friend, is nearby, and her proximity again makes him want to breathe deeply, do crazy things and smile. And when a child appears, he becomes triple desired and loved - and his mother even more so.
It is not surprising that at all times, family unions with a twenty-year or even more age difference were in the order of things. An inexperienced girl gains wisdom, and a respectable man seems to be eating rejuvenating apples.
However, there are, of course, disadvantages and pitfalls. If a girl is going to formalize a relationship with an older man, she should study the characteristics of such a family. For example, it is important to understand which of the three main types of older lovers a potential husband belongs to.
The first type - let's call it "Lovelace". He has considerable experience in dealing with the female sex, and has more than one divorce behind him. However, there are also advantages to this: his ex-wives worked a lot on his upbringing and education - there is no need to accustom him. He knows how to solve many family problems, including coping with his wife’s bad mood.
But the disadvantages are a continuation of the advantages: having been in the hands of different women, he can compare. Maybe one of his ex-wives was an irresistible beauty, another was a rocker in bed, and the third could cook at the level of a restaurant chef. In love “for the last time,” he believes that you will be an ideal, uniting all the best. But you are unlikely to be suitable for the role of such a super-heroine wife.
The second type is an old bachelor. This “young guy” lived to be fifty years old and was quite happy with life, but then somehow he suddenly realized that old age was just around the corner, and no one would give him a glass of water. Most often, he has everything in order with money, housing, and social status - but he needs care, tenderness and heirs.
What other advantages does such a husband have? Usually, these people make wonderful fathers, ready to do anything with their child and pass on their knowledge and skills to him.
The main problem of such relationships is hidden in bed - and sometimes it is not so easy to solve. But anything is possible, especially with the use of modern and ancient medicine. Most likely, his sexuality only needs to be awakened, and then he will turn into the man of his dreams.
The third type is illustrated by the saying “gray hair in a beard, a devil in a rib.” The usual story: a man lives with his wife almost until his silver wedding, the children have already grown up - and then a midlife or even older age crisis comes. And then he comes across a young girl, passion flares up. First comes a double life, then a painful divorce. The new wife is happy, but... as a rule, not for long.
Because what he needed was not a new family, but new sensations, a shake-up, adventures. The mistress was a holiday, an outlet - and now she becomes a wife, turning into what he was running from. Now she sweeps the floors and stands at the stove, and he calls his ex-wife, asking about the children, and simply out of nostalgia. The outbreak of love subsides, and often the matter ends with a return to the old family - or a new young lover.
But still, in this case, everything is by no means hopeless. Often a young lady copes with this test of transition from the category of mistresses to wives - and then life turns out to be bright and interesting. Most often, her husband, even at the age of “over sixty,” will be young and fresh as a cucumber - preferring to ski or even snowboard. He will be strikingly different for the better from his aged peers, and there will be very few everyday problems in his life.
Say goodbye to prejudice
As Alexander Sergeevich wrote, all ages are submissive to love. True, the classic added to this a weighty “but” about young and virgin hearts. Thank God, the youth of the heart can be preserved into adulthood. Usually relationships with a large age difference are much more tender than those of peers - what's wrong with that? If feelings are real, then you need to live in accordance with them, and not with stupid advice or prejudices.
Why do young girls love older men? Because there is something to love! For “fatherly” help, for mature wisdom, for spiritual sensitivity and depth - for everything that peers usually cannot boast of.
How can you not like it! And for reliability, of course - mature men look like a stronghold of calm (and usually not only look!). They can warn, guide, and explain in time. Finally, they usually have much fewer problems with fidelity.
And the elderly man happily takes care of the woman, and her individual stupidities do not make him angry, but a light and kind smile. And his love is more honest and proven. He wants exactly this woman, he considers her the best - with his wealth of experience! This not only flatters, but also warms the soul of the chosen one. Is it any wonder why girls love older men and often make a choice in their favor?
Much less often, but there are also relationships with another sign - young guys meet with experienced women. Why can a young guy fall in love with an older woman? First of all, for her self-sufficiency and independence. She will not throw a tantrum if her husband forgot to call, does not demand entertainment and endless declarations of love, and respects men's freedom. And, of course, it’s simply more interesting with her.
In a word, down with prejudices! The jokes of your friends and the sidelong glances of your mother - all this can be easily survived, but your real happiness is much more important. And it’s stupid to sacrifice the happiness that you can give each other just because of a few numbers in your passport!
Love relationships between a man and a woman should not be discussed by others. Everything that happens between lovers should remain their personal business. However, many people become interested in situations when love happens between partners, where one may be old enough to be the other’s father (or mother). Is love possible in a relationship between an older man and a young girl? Let's look at the issue from all sides.
It is usually believed that the age difference between partners should not exceed 5 years. This is due to the fact that peers have more common interests, views on life and values than people with a greater difference in age. If you take a couple where the man is much older than his partner, then one of the most important problems arises here - the difference in views and even upbringing.
The older one was raised differently from the younger one. And upbringing plays a significant role in how people live, what they get used to, and even what goals they set for the future. It may happen that a man will be raised on the principles of fidelity and stability, and a girl may be from that generation when children were taught freedom and a desire for only entertainment.
The women's site does not exclude the possibility that love feelings may arise between an adult man and a young girl. However, we should not forget that feelings quickly pass, and partners begin to live with each other’s habits, strengths and weaknesses, views and principles.
Is love possible between an older man and a young girl? Possible, despite the fact that most couples are built for completely different reasons. We are talking about benefits, which are not always material. Usually everyone is looking for some benefit in whoever they choose. And more and more love between people of different generations is becoming impossible.
Why does a young girl choose an older man?
It becomes an interesting question, especially for young guys, why young girls choose older men for love relationships. What is so interesting about them if their potency is not the same and their interests may differ?
The first and most common reason is the financial side. A girl chooses an adult man only because he has money. Moreover, a man may have this money in small quantities, but it will not be difficult for him to spend it on a girl. By and large, by his mature years, a man already acquires everything he wanted. Now he earns money purely for everyday needs, and he can easily spend the rest on a woman.
Young girls are satisfied with the fact that they, with their youth, carefreeness and sexuality, can attract mature men who have money. It is the material issue that interests many young girls. For what purposes do they need money?
- To purchase various trinkets and clothes.
- For the opportunity to travel and relax.
- The opportunity to solve all your financial problems.
- Just live at someone else's expense, without worrying about anything.
After all, let’s not forget that the majority of girls do not want to work and earn money. They are ready to pursue their beauty and sexuality so that only men will love and provide for them.
Psychologists have already named the second reason, since girls can rarely identify it: the desire to be under their father’s wing. This often happens to girls who grew up without fathers. The absence of fatherly love and the thirst to feel it can push girls to build love relationships with older men. And here girls treat men like daddies, not like men. Cheating is also common here, since girls are sexually attracted to younger boyfriends and perceive their men as “daddy.”
It should be noted that today there is a certain fashion for young girls to connect their relationships with older men, and for mature gentlemen to pay attention to young women. This is associated mainly with the beauty of young girls, next to whom men also become rejuvenated. The girl is chasing the material wealth of an adult gentleman, who already has everything she needs, unlike young guys. Why then does an adult man become interested in young beauties?
Why does a grown man choose a young girl for love?
A love relationship cannot be built without mutual desire. Why girls choose older men has already been clarified. But what attracts grown men to young girls?
The first is fashion. As already mentioned, today every wealthy man should have a young mistress. Moreover, it does not matter here whether this man is married or single. If he is sexually active, has money and leads an active social life, then he should have a young passion.
The race for youth - that's what it's called. A mature man seems to be trying to regain his youth by dating a younger girl. Moreover, the choice sometimes reaches the point of absurdity when a man chooses a girl of 18 years of age or when the man himself has already reached his 60th birthday, and his passion has not even reached 25 years old.
What can connect an older man and a young girl? The man is drawn to her youth. Either he himself wants to be young, remember his younger years and even try something from what he did in his youth, or he is simply testing his ability to interest young girls who have quite high claims and demands. There is a game being played here, passion and excitement are present, but not love.
Recently, the topic of old men and young women has been increasingly discussed. Like, the older a man gets, the younger his partner becomes. Some men even destroy their families in order to be free to have relationships with young girls. Why does an older man start a relationship with a stupid young woman?
The most common answer to this question is the following: a man wants to remember his younger years. Next to a young girl, anyone will return to the same age. With her naivety, stupidity, behavior and way of life, she will encourage you to become a little like her. And men who are nostalgic for the old days often start dating girls much younger than themselves to refresh their memories, cheer up and become more carefree.
An older man chooses a young ugly woman - what does this lead to? Over time, the man realizes how tiring his lifestyle is. Being young, reckless and carefree is fun. But life again and again brings him back to reality: fun is good, but you need to be responsible, smart, reasonable. A young girl does not think about the consequences of her actions, unlike a man. Hanging out with young people is fun. But more mature people can provide calm, stability, support, understanding, etc.
An attempt to return to youth through a relationship with a young girl is to understand once again that being an adult is much better than not knowing what you want, wasting your life on meaningless gestures, getting into trouble and being afraid of punishment.
The second reason can be called a man’s desire to show off his passion to his friends. Men compete with each other all their lives. And a young girl is considered a kind of trophy that is very difficult to get.
In fact, young girls themselves “hang themselves” on mature men, and becoming her prince is quite easy. The question is: how long will their relationship last, where everyone is looking for benefits, and love is completely absent?
Prospects for a relationship between an older man and a young girl
An interesting question becomes what the prospects for a relationship between an adult man and a young girl will be. If relationships are built not out of cold calculation, but out of love, based on feelings, then you should know what the dangers are:
- A grown man will not adapt to a girl. He wants to live the way he is used to. It will be difficult for him to change anything in his life. Therefore, he will wake up when he is accustomed to, work as much as he considers necessary, and do things that he has been doing for a long time. This girl will have to adapt to his lifestyle. Otherwise, scandals will begin, and the man will think about breaking up.
- An adult man will differ in his interests and views. No matter how much he tries to be young, his youth will be significantly different from hers. She can constantly go to nightclubs, and after the first night he will get tired of it. She will sleep during the day, and he will do business. Their values and views will diverge, even though they will want to be young.
- An adult man will no longer solve his woman’s problems. He can give money or advise something, but he will not constantly deal with the problems of his passion. He will not be able to understand her experiences on some topics, since he has already learned not to suffer and not pay attention to something.
- A grown man is not as young as he may seem. He may already have developed chronic diseases. He may be a frequent visitor to doctors. Is the young girl ready to look after him and stay by his side while he falls ill and cannot pamper her?
- An adult man can no longer give birth to healthy offspring. If a girl dreams of children, then they are possible with an adult man. Only now the health of the children themselves will be at risk, since their dad no longer has healthy sperm.
Despite all the difficulties in a relationship, if a girl wants to keep it, then everything will depend on her. Her boyfriend is always ready to build a relationship with her; he almost never leaves her. However, she must do everything.
How to please an older man?
If a young beauty is aimed at conquering an adult male heart, then she should know that it will be easy for her to do this.
- Firstly, you should dress classically. Provocative clothes, mini skirts and deep necklines - this is all for those men who are looking for lovers for a short time. If you want to build a relationship, then you need to dress classically.
- Secondly, communicate on a first-name basis. You are not looking for an adult man, but a loved one with whom your relationship should be equal.
- Thirdly, the quality of communication. Topics should be relevant, deep, relevant or real. A man is not interested in discussing the topic of who bought which blouse or why Dasha broke up with Vitya. It is necessary to talk with him about topics about sports, politics, work, leisure, etc. At the same time, it is important not only to talk, but also to listen, not only to listen, but also to speak, that is, to maintain the “golden mean.”
Bottom line
If we talk about the relationship between an adult man and a young girl, then in most cases we talk about the futility of this union. As a result, the couple breaks up, because either the girl begins to go out of her way because of her “old fart”, or the man gets tired of the active life position of his young passion.
However, we do not exclude those isolated cases when partners really build their relationship out of love. Then they live the same way as other couples built on love feelings.